Skanky girl walking down hall to friends: She told me to put my cigarette out… I put it in my bra.
Asher Alternative High School
Detroit, Michigan
Skanky girl walking down hall to friends: She told me to put my cigarette out… I put it in my bra.
Asher Alternative High School
Detroit, Michigan
Bimbette government teacher, explaining checks and balances: So then, like, the national government says to the state government, “Um, you can’t do that, you little… like, state.”
Canton, Michigan
Professor: So the wars of opium wars were fought because the Chinese didn’t want their citizens smoking their bongos and being loopy.
Student: Wait, bongos?
Professor: Yeah those pipe things… Bongos, right?
Michigan State University
East Lansing, Michigan
Overheard by: Erika
Professor: Cats aren’t capable of going into your home, judging what items are valuable, and dragging those items away.
Michigan State University
Michigan
Overheard by: sjshock
Girl #1: I can understand the idea behind having an affair…
Girl #2: Yeah, it’s the change of scenery.
Girl #3: The change of dick…
East Lansing, Michigan
Mitt Romney volunteer: So basically I asked my husband if we could please try not to have a baby this year.
Mackinac Island, Michigan
Overheard by: Glad I Chose Fred Thompson
Girl on phone: No, I’m sure she didn’t mean that… No, really, you must have taken it wrong… No! Trust me, I’m sure when she called you a whore she didn’t mean it that way!
Grand Valley State University
Allendale, Michigan
Overheard by: breakin-laker
Boy: I wish everything in the world was made of chocolate.
Grandfather: That would sure be interesting!
Boy: Yeah. Then I could eat my brother…
Waterford, Michigan
Overheard by: Gary Lewis
Kid in cafeteria: Yeah, that was the night we watched Shrek and made love for the first time.
East Lansing, Michigan
Overheard by: Cammie
