Undies

(two girls exit bathroom stall together)
Girl #1: It was such a pleasure watching you. It was bliss.

Elbo Room Bar
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: crafty biotech

Girl: So, my boyfriend couldn’t take off my bra. I told him I’d wear the front-clasp one next time. He was like, ‘I don’t want your pity bra!’ Wanna try?
Queer pal, trying to remove bra: Oh my god! This is not a pity bra! This is the meanest bra in the whole world!

Montreal
Canadia

Chick: So, are you still trying to work out how to put a G-string on an octopus?

http://community.livejournal.com/overheardinmelb/168856.html

Teen on cell: It doesn’t matter! Two pairs of underwear does not equal one pair of pants!

Michigan State University
Lansing, Michigan

Five-year-old boy, loudly interrupting adults: I have a wedgie!
(adults laugh)
Five-year-old boy: This wedgie train is carrying wedgies!

Green Line
Boston, Massachusetts

Old dude to another, reminiscing: You still got that briefcase with all that underwear in it?

Kansas City, Missouri

Husband: I'm good at finding little kids' panties.
Wife: That's not a quality that you should announce.

Jersey City, New Jersey

Ambiguous boy, yelling to friend across hall: And no pictures of me without pants!

High School
Nashville, Tennessee

Grandson, watching grandmother hold cigar as if it was a joint: If grandma takes off her bra and burns it, I'm gonna freak out.
Grandma: Oh, Simon! I'm not wearing one.

Spencer, Iowa

Little boy picking up women’s underwear: Mommy, what is this?
Mother: That’s women’s underwear.
Little boy: I’m touching women’s underwear?! I’m touching women’s underwear!
Mother: Stay away from that, Tommy*.

Target
Novi, Michigan