(on a bus passing city jail)
Mom: Look kids… that's where daddy is.
(pause)
Mom: I can give you a haircut.
Man: I like the lady who does my hair, she has good mirrors so I can see the back of my head.
Mom: I've got good mirrors. I've got mirrors on the ceiling, too.
Bus
Omaha, Nebraska
Guy to girl in bar: What did you have, some of that Blood of Christ?
Girl: Yeah!
Guy: Yeah?!
Girl: Yeah! It's yummy!
Bar
Lincoln, Nebraska
Overheard by: Jill
Guy: Do you have any money left?
Chunky 40-something man: 60 bucks, that should be enough to get me by until my mother gives me more.
Omaha, Nebraska
Overheard by: Kristin
Guy to drunk girl at a party, whispering loudly: Will you have sex with me?
Drunk girl: No.
Guy: Please?
Drunk girl: No.
Guy: Aww…come on!
Omaha, Nebraska
Guy #1, about super tan waitress: Wow, she’s well done. I prefer medium-well.
Guy #2: Yeah, me, too. I like a little pink.
Lincoln, Nebraska
Overheard by: evh
Five-year-old girl, about fountain in outside eating area: Oh! High drama!
Bellevue, Nebraska
Overheard by: Cortny
Four-year-old kid, pickig up magazine: Hey, Dad, it’s Britney Spears!
Dad: No, that’s Jamie Lynn, her sister.
Four-year-old kid: Ohhh, the pregnant one.
Dad: Yep.
Four-year-old kid: But she’s not even an adult!
Dad: You don’t have to be an adult to get pregnant.
Four-year-old kid: So then how do you get pregnant?! [Dad puts magazine back.]
Omaha, Nebraska
Overheard by: Cortny
Chick #1: A woman came up to me and said there was a guy beating off into the dress.
Chick #2: Really?!
Chick #1: Sure enough, I walked over and his pants were around his ankles.
Guy passerby: Where the hell do you work?
Omaha, Nebraska
Chick, approaching yuppie guy: Hey I haven't seen you since…
Yuppie guy: Since I nailed you in the high school bathroom! Four… five years ago, right Jen?
Chick: No, that wasn't me. But thanks for remembering my name!
Bar
Nebraska
Overheard by: allie
