Suit on cell: I don’t know much about this party he’s throwing, other than he got me a pregnant stripper.

Del Monte Shopping Center
Monterey, California

Overheard by: Amy

Professor: No drinking and driving this weekend! No drugs! …and no babies.

Ball State University
Muncie, Indiana

Overheard by: Sara

20-something girl: So I had to go to the emergency room because I thought I had a baby.
Shocked co-worker: What?! What was it?
20-something girl: Just my period. But it was a bad one.

Biloxi, Mississippi

Overheard by: don't ditch health class

Girl #1: How's your sister?
Girl #2: She's a whore. If she wasn't pregnant, I'd go beat her ass.

University of New Orleans, Louisiana

Guy #1: Hey bro, your woman fat?
Guy #2: No. Fuck, man! What you talkin'? She my baby momma, that the baby in her bump!
Guy #3: You sure? She sure look fat to me.

Coralridge Mall
Iowa City, Iowa

Lady #1: … And I don’t even know who the daddy is!
Lady #2: That’s hilarious!

B. Dalton – College Square Mall
Cedar Falls, Iowa

Overheard by: Darcy

Girl #1: I’m all freaked out now! I bet you she’s pregnant! My sister’s pregnant!
Girl #2: I’m sure she’s not pregnant, you’re assuming the worst.
Girl #1: Oh my god! What if she has testicle cancer?!


Overheard by: monkey

Dude #1: Dude, if you're gonna artificially inseminate your sister's girlfriend, you gotta fuck her, right?
Dude #2: Absolutely!
Dude #1: Otherwise, you got no respect for yourself.

Overheard by: elizabeth

Girl #1: I’ve been feeling so weird lately.
Girl #2: You’re probably pregnant.
Girl #1: … What?
Girl #2: I was kidding.
Girl #1: Oh-fuck-oh-fuck-oh-fuck — when was my last period?!

Piccadilly Line

Overheard by: BoogyFantastic

College girl #1: Eating raw fish makes you super fertile.
College girl #2: Really?
College girl #1: Yeah, thats why I get pregnant so much.

Japanese Restaurant
Richmond, Virginia