White mother to white toddler son: You're going to be black by the time we leave!
Grand Sierra Resort Pool
Reno, Nevada
Teenage daughter: Mom, I have a plan for my future.
Mother: And what's that?
Teenage daughter: Save someone's life so they are indebted to me and will buy me the complete Twilight Zone boxed set.
Mother: Between this and your brother who I haven't seen in four days, I don't think I screwed up at all.
Highlands Ranch, Colorado
Overheard by: Julia
Mother admonishing her child for sticking his head through the bars in a fence: You do not put your head through anything. Ever.
Disney World
Florida
Overheard by: Becca
Grandma, after car cuts bus off: Bitchassfaggot.
Daughter: Mom!
Grandma: Well, that's what they are!
Public Transit
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Five-year-old girl: I think we got almost all of the blood out, mommy. You know, Liam's blood? We got almost all of it out of the sheets. That was a lot of blood.
Mom: Yes we did, honey.
Rest Stop,Turnpike South
New Jersey
Overheard by: TM
Boy, holding bodice-ripper romance novel: Dad, is this a book for fifth-graders?
Distracted father: No. Put it back.
Boy: What is it?
Distracted father: Hardcore pornography. Put it back.
Fairwood, Washington
Overheard by: he was so hopeful
Two-year-old: Waaaaah!
White trash mom: You want mommy to push your stroller?
Two-year-old: Waaaaah!
White trash dad: You wanna go ten feet under?!
White trash mom: Honey, it's six feet.
Sears
Nashua, New Hampshire
Overheard by: jefe