Girlfriend to boyfriend who is trying hard not to look at a hot girl dancing sexily: Don't worry baby, I'm getting the erection for you.
Manhattan, New York
Girlfriend to boyfriend who is trying hard not to look at a hot girl dancing sexily: Don't worry baby, I'm getting the erection for you.
Manhattan, New York
Guy to another: You know we're dating the nicest girls in the world, right? And we took their virginities! So you know that if we break up with them we're gonna be the assholes. We're fucked.
Jersey City, New Jersey
30-something woman: I will never find true love.
Barely legal guy: Well, you've got a husband, you've got me, and you've got the two other guys you're sleeping with, so it's not for lack of trying!
Clarksville, Indiana
Guy: Man, there's too much ketchup on my plate, it looks like my fries committed suicide.
Girl: I often think about that before I stick you in my mouth, too.
Guy: Fuck off , Andrea.
Northern Alabama
Girl, carrying armloads of stuff: I don't have a free hand to lock the door with.
Boyfriend, in most sketch-ass tone imaginable: Use your mouth.
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Hazzenkockle
Lesbian, about ex girlfriend: I mean, the only thing liberal about her is she's gay.
Atlanta, Georgia
Guy #1: So I sent her a picture of my junk.
Guy #2: Right.
Guy #1: Problem solved.
Sandusky, Ohio
Hot, black female nerd on phone: No, I don't need you to explain to me why Batman can't be Asian. That's a conversation we only need to have once.
Connecticut
Overheard by: Bruce Lee Wayne
Girl #1, listening to John Denver: This is a great song. Especially if you're gay. You should have this at your wedding.
Girl #2: Well, if I marry a gay guy, it'll be great.
Phildelphia, Pennsylvania
Girl: I had a dream you died, and I woke up crying.
Guy: I woke up screaming, but that's because I dreamed I was being chased by aliens.
Bellingham, Washington
