Teachers

Physics professor: Where are all the physicists? Eh, we're all cab drivers, drug addicts and musicians.

Cupertino, California

Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl loves physics

Professor, about megafauna: I would love to have a giant beaver.

GWU Archaeology lecture
Washington, DC

Teacher: Are you guys understanding this?
Class: [Stares blankly.]Teacher: It feels like I’m taking my clothes off.
Class: What?
Teacher: I meant that this is disturbing.

Kenosha, Wisconsin

Professor: I want to please you… Not with goats, but with sentences.

Greek Class
UCLA, California

Overheard by: shepherd

Happy teacher: Welcome to creative writing class. This class is like us taking a hot bath. Together. With candles.

Harpeth Hall School
Nashville, Tennessee

Yes

Student: I bet half of the kids are still going to show up at the computer room.
Teacher: You think half of them will, or half of them won’t?

East Meadow Drive
Palo Alto, California

Lecturer: If I’d given you gin instead of phonology, no doubt you’d all be sitting closer together.

Manchester University
UK

Overheard by: Ferdinand

Student: Professor, can you repeat that question?
Professor: I can’t remember! I just make this shit up.

American University
Washington, DC

Teacher to chatty class: Everyone, quiet, we have to go over this!
(class continues chatting)
Guy in the back: I will kill you all.
(class falls silent)

High School
Chesapeake, Virginia

Student: Hey bruh, can I ansuh?!
Teacher: Yeah, sure… Wait, what did you call me?
Student: Bruh?
Teacher, grining: That made my day!

Nashville, Tennessee