Teachers

English professor: Outer space is occupied by evil orientals.

Marymount University
Arlington, Virginia

Overheard by: Sarah Yvonne

Irritated English professor: I think I'm just going to change all my paper assignments to “create an inscrutable utterance.”

Ursinus College
Pennsylvania

Professor: And these cultural anthropologists have discovered many different aspects of law in the countries they live in that differ to ours.
(pause)
Older student: Did you know that you can't own pygmies?

The Evergreen State College
Olympia, Washington

Overheard by: Katie

Psych professor: I think it’s a usable vagina.

University of Pennsylvania
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: I’d use it

Teacher: So, women are in fact always…what?
Student: Wrong?

Classroom
Denmark

Overheard by: Allan Loff Jakobsen

Professor: When thinking about a case, you have to start by listing all the parties. You go, “We are the plaintiffs, the mighty, mighty plaintiffs…”

Law School
Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: MaggieB

Student: Isn't all truth metaphysical by this standard?
Law professor: Are you stoned?

UC Hastings
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: Loving this

Professor: … But then he said that maybe drag isn’t a great idea before you’re tenured.

Hartford, Connecticut

Overheard by: Claire

Literature teacher: So what the Europeans did was take the description of Jesus from the texts and made their images of him Caucasian so as to be more relatable to those they were teaching to.
Girl of questionable literacy: European Jesus was hot.

Delta Secondary School
Ladner, British Columbia
Canadia

Best Shakespeare professor ever: I love metaphors. Metaphors be with you!

College of St. Rose
Albany, New York

Overheard by: Erin