Canadia

Drunk guy: Everyone in this room should get hair extensions.

Toronto
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Meech

Small child, pointing to an “eat pussy” graffiti painted on the side of a restaurant: Daddy, what does that say?
Father: It’s a menu.

Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: Chikara

Girl: Hey, Chantelle*! Chantelle!
Chantelle: What?
Girl: Did you bring skank boots?
Chantelle: Yeah.

Drama class, All Saints High School
Whitby, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: freshman whisperer

Black guy: You keep hearing about how racist Britain's getting, it's pretty scary.
White girlfriend: Oh, totally. I think that before anyone in that country over 40 is allowed to make a public statement they should take a test that's like “is this quaint, or just racist?” and if they fail they shouldn't be allowed to say anything.
Black guy: That would be an awesome game show.

Calgary
Alberta
Canadia

IT teacher: So if the CPU usage is really high, choose “end process tree” to kill the process.
Student in back, mumbling: That's what she said…
IT teacher: Damn right that's what she said!

Waterloo
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Sunny

Chick #1: Oh my god, Latonya! You should’ve written down ‘Bubbles’!
Chick #2: Bubbles?
Latonya: Yeah, that’s my gangster name. I know it’s not tough, but I still like it!

All Saints High School
Whitby, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: male student reluctantly forced into a group

Harried mom to adorable eight-year-old girl: You just ask a policeman. Next time you see a policeman you ask him, “Is it illegal for me to sleep in my mommy's car?”

Toronto
Canadia

Girl on cell: Did you write it on my Facebook? Was it perverted or mean? Yeah? Good.

Halifax, Nova Scotia
Canadia

Teenage girl: You know what I wish I had?
Teenage boy, not paying attention: Uh-huh.
Teenage girl: A penis… I'd just go shoving it into people's butts.
Teenage boy: Wait… What?
Teenage girl, whispering to herself: I wish I had a penis.

Bus
Ottawa
Canadia

Chick: Gay is not an ethnicity! I don't care if they have their own mafia!

Outside Central Library
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia