Sober girl: Look, all I'm saying is, I wouldn't fucking mess with her. She's clinically insane.
Drunk girl: But you know, I think she's really smart. There are those people, you know, that are so smart they're like actually crazy… Real mental, and we just think they're weird, but they're not! They have like, an IQ of 200!
Sober girl: You do realize that she drew pictures of her friends decapitated, right?
Wellington
New Zealand
Overheard by: Were they talking about the same person?
Drunk girl #1: God, I hate you. How do you stay so skinny?
Drunk girl #2: I only eat when I’m drunk.
United Kingdom
Overheard by: Nighttime Smoker
Tipsy guy to girl beside him: What are you doing later?
Girl: Going home to Scotchgard my bathrobe.
Duke & Duchess Bar
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Cooper Street Relic
Coworker: Where were you? You were meant to be in work at 7!
Drunk Slovakian guy arriving at work: I drank Jack Daniels until 5 this morning, then went to bed. I woke at nine and fucked Jane, then got my brother to drop me off at work.
Craigavon
Northern Ireland
Drunk male friend: What do you want for your birthday, baby? I can make it happen, just tell me what you want!
Really, really drunk birthday girl, pointing at someone else: I want in that guy's pants!
Norfolk, Virginia
Drunk girl: Look! I have salt stains all over my pants. I'm a car.
Saint Joseph's University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Drunk chick: Look, this is going to take five seconds. I just want to say hi, suck him off, and then we can leave.
http://greenoverheard.blogspot.com/2006/02/what-happened-to-shaking-hands.html
Overheard by:
Drunk girl: Oh my god, how can you be wearing a t-shirt right now? It’s so cold outside!
Bouncer: I love the cold. In fact, I have the air conditioning on in my apartment right now.
Drunk girl: Wow, so, what are you? Like, from Florida or something?
Bouncer: No… That doesn’t make any sense.
Washington Street
Brighton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Patron
Fat drunk guy: I really like your shirt. It's very intellectual.
Girl: Uh, thanks.
Fat drunk guy: I mean, I'm in college, I like to think deep, you know? I want to make films. Deep films.
Girl: Yeah, that'll be cool.
Fat drunk guy: How old are you?
Girl: I'm 16.
Fat drunk guy: Oh, I'm 18. Well…I mean, I'm 23.
Shreveport, Louisiana
Overheard by: Elle
Drunk bimbette: We’re s’posed to be so ladylike… Why do girls have to be so ghetto and stab each other all the time?
York University
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: A and A
