Teacher to girl picking lint off her boobs: Pay attention, please.
Girl: I can't! I'm cleaning!
Potomac, Maryland
Teacher to girl picking lint off her boobs: Pay attention, please.
Girl: I can't! I'm cleaning!
Potomac, Maryland
Small-chested hiking girl: Damn! Hey, you'd wipe the sweat off my boobs, right?
Busty hiking girl: Only if you wipe mine.
Small-chested hiking girl: Somehow I think I'm going to have to do a lot more work.
Hiking boy: Uhhh…
Fort Boreman Park Hiking Trails
Parkersburg, West Virginia
20-something nasty-looking girl in pub, scratching furiously down trousers: Jesus, my clunge itches!
Leamington Spa
England
Guy: So she lied to me. She said she wasn't eighteen.
Girl: How old was she?
Guy: Nineteen. And she said she wasn't a stripper.
Berkeley, California
Girl #1: Oh, I love Law & Order: SVU!
Girl #2: I know! Rape just brings out the best in people!
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: 804laura
Guy to crowd of housemates: See, this is the kind of toilet we want–it's rated to be able to flush one kilo of material at a time.
Girl: How many kilos does a newborn weigh?
Home Depot
Oakland, California
Overheard by: Alchemist George
Girl: I'm gonna miss smoking.
Guy: We both will. Oh, well…
Girl: I'll just replace it by giving you blowjobs all the time.
Guy: Yeah, we can't do that in public.
Girl: We can carry around a tent. Or I can carry around a parasol, and if anyone asks I can say I'm under my property and they're trespassing.
New Jersey
Bride-to-be: Oh my god! I'm totally getting wedding-day head!
Friend: Oooh! Is that like before the ceremony or after?
Bride-to-be: Huh?
Groomsman: Does the groom get some head too?
Friend: Hell no! That shit stops once they're married!
Bride-to-be: What? Oh my god, you guys! I meant I'm getting nervous!
Chicago, Illinois
Girl #1: You should stop meeting guys off the internet so much. They're creepy.
Girl #2: The internet is the best place to meet people. I met a rapist at a job interview, a pimp at the airport, and a pedophile at church.
Norman, Oklahoma
Flighty girl: People always tell me I'm pretty. Like all the time. Even when I was little, people would say “Oh, you're so pretty!” I used to say “I know” but now I say “thank you.”
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Nahtay
