American backpacker girl, about her new hostel boyfriend: So, as of this afternoon, he’s one step closer to not being a virgin.
Dutch girl, shocked: What about your period?!
American friend, walking up: Don’t worry. Just do it. He won’t even know what’s going on anyways.
Loki Hostel
La Paz
Bolivia
Girl in stall: I have paper stuck in my vagina.
Friend: You might not want to say that, there’s people here.
Girl in stall: Why is vagina a bad word?
Ladies Room, Foreplay Bar
Portland, Maine
Overheard by: How did it get there?
Guy: So I fell asleep in bio today and when I woke up this bitch was watching me.
Girl: Good story.
Guy: And then I sneezed.
Girl: [Laughs.] Wait, that was actually part of your story?
Hoboken, New Jersey
Tall guy: My girlfriend’s ex-boyfriend had an eight inch penis.
Younger friend girl: What!? Why would she tell you that?!
Tall guy: I guess she just thought I should know.
Younger friend girl: No, here’s a better question. Why would you tell me that!?
Chick-fil-A
Houston, Texas
Little girl: My pizza is naked!
Fresh Grocer
Drexel Hill, Pennsylvania
College girl to friend: He’s a really scary driver. He’ll go fifty on gravel roads. I mean, I go fifty on gravel roads, but only if I’m really, really drunk.
El Rancho
Columbia, Missouri
Overheard by: RW
Boy: So, if you’re afraid of the leprechaun from that one movie, does that mean you’re afraid of the lucky charm leprechaun too?
Girl: No, no, no. I’m only afraid of the *real* ones.
Chapel Hill, North Carolina
Overheard by: Amused
Grungy dude, pointing to expensive vacuum: You should get this one. It sucks up everything!
Girlfriend: Yeah, but I don’t have much carpet. I need, like, a Broom Vac or something.
Grungy dude: A Broom Vac?! Put down the crack pipe!
Target
Baltimore, Maryland
Victoria’s Secret salesgirl to couple: Our bras are 15% off today.
Male: I prefer it when your bras are 100% off.
Victoria’s Secret salesgirl: [With a blank look on her face.] That wouldn’t make sense. Then they would be free.
Depford Mall
Depford, New Jersey
Overheard by: Philly Joe
