Gossip

Guy: Okay, but what’s the biggest problem?
Girl: It’s so annoying! Every time I go into her room she’s masturbating!

http://www.overheardatmcgill.com/archives/2007/04/12/guy-does-she-have-a-roommate-for-next-year-yet/

Dude: He made out with a hooker?! No one makes out with a hooker! What was he thinking?!

http://overheardlines.blogspot.com/2007/04/guy-in-suit-talking-on-cell.html

Overheard by: j

Hipster girl to boyfriend: Tanya is either wasted or at the Home Depot — there’s no in-between.

Beacon Hill
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Michael

Dude at bar: So wait, after her husband left her here by herself–completely shitfaced–she then fucked a total stranger in the bathroom?
Bartender: Yep.
Dude at bar: And then she came back out here bragging about getting banged in the ass?
Gay dude, sidling up: Sounds like an awesome night.

District Bar
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Big D

Yale girl: Last night when I was getting ready to go to bed I was putting pajamas on and there was half a quesadilla in my bra.

http://overheardatyale.blogspot.com/

Hipster chick: … So then his mom said, ‘Get your cock out of the fish tank!’

Gabrielino High School
San Gabriel, California

Overheard by: Alexia

Girl to boy: What did you say when your balls dropped? ‘Well, that’s different!’

40th and Sansom Streets
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Emily

Queer answering cell: Jesus Christ, where have you been? I thought you were sold into the sexual slave trade!

Austin, Texas

Overheard by: The Megster

Friend #1: He actually has had sex before.
Friend #2: What! I thought he was on the V-boat with me!
Friend #1: The V-boat?
Friend #2: It's like a U-boat, but sadder.

Montreal
Canadia

Overheard by: Not on the boat

Suit: … And of course afterwards she ran up and down the hospital corridor naked, screaming at her husband.

Bakery
Christchurch
New Zealand