Portrait of the Overheard Editor As a Young Girl

Five-year-old girl: Yeah, so anyway, sometimes farts stink and sometimes they don’t. But they’re always a fart.
Instructor: Oh… I don’t think this is appropriate talk… Maybe we should change the subject.
Five-year-old girl: Yeah. We should change the subject… To naked people.

Pennsylvania

Posted on November 9, 2014
Gossip, Kids, Pennsylvania

But a Wise Man Would Have a Paddle Ready

Dude #1: So, you’re saying the moon is going to shrink to the size of a ping pong ball?
Dude #2: Yeah, but I’m not a scientist, so I can’t tell you how it’s going to happen.

http://overheardlines.blogspot.com/2007/02/guy-on-muni-whos-what-then-psychic.html

Overheard by: tim

Posted on October 13, 2014
Dorks, Geeks & Nerds, Gossip, Overheard Lines

It Didn’t Fit

Man on phone: Where’s Joey? [To someone at the table] Where’s Joey? [Into phone] He’s in the bathroom trying on a dress.

http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2007/03/which-bathroom.html

Overheard by: bananna lee fishbones

Posted on October 11, 2014
Coworkers, Gossip, Overheard in PDX

Totally Worth It

Man to buddy: She’s the one who introduced me to the lesbian that beat me up after sex.

Adams Morgan, DC
http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2007/02/sounds-like-my-kind-of-lesbian.html

Posted on October 9, 2014
Eavesdrop DC, Gossip, Guys, Washington, DC

It’s Only a Hall-of-Famer If You Still Scored

Guy #1: Dude, I’m really embarrassed. Last night I peed in her roommate’s closet.
Guy #2: Hall of fame! That’s hall of fame material!

http://overheardatlc.blogspot.com/2007/01/just-what-hall-are-we-discussing.html

Posted on August 20, 2014
Colleges & Universities, Frat boy types, Gossip, Overheard at Loyola, Pee

Unfortunately, There’s Not Enough of Them to Go Around

Hipster girl: Communists love my boobs.

Kent, Ohio

Posted on August 19, 2014
Gossip, Hipsters, Ohio, Rack

Dude, That Was Me!

Man: Did I ever tell you about the time that a tick got stuck under the foreskin of my friend’s penis?

Port-A-Potty
http://weirdosofwinnipeg.blogspot.com/2007/02/tick-talk.html

Posted on June 6, 2014
Friends, Gossip, Penis, Weirdos of Winnipeg

But I Prefer the Good-Looking Strippers

Orthodox Jew with cello case: They let you play with dogs in Vegas!

http://www.overheardatmcgill.com/archives/2007/03/16/so-two-orthodox-musicians-and-a-dog-walk-into-a-casinowait-you-know-this-one/

Posted on December 14, 2013
Gossip, Jews, Overheard at McGill

Nothing Tastes As Good As Dead Feels

Woman on cell: So, she hasn’t had anything to eat since Monday afternoon… Yeah, I guess that means she’s doing great!

Arby’s
Lebanon, Ohio

Posted on December 6, 2013
Gossip, Ohio, On the phone

That’s Always One for the Scrapbook

Kid to mom in car with windows up: Mom! I peed outside today! Mom! Did you hear what I said? I peed outside today! [Mom doesn’t respond.] Mom! Mom! I peed outside today! I peed outside today!
Mom, opening the door: Shut up and get in the car.

Kindercare, 196th Street
Lynnwood, Washington

Overheard by: snickerpants

Posted on December 5, 2013
Gossip, Parenting, Pee, Should have used a condom, Washington

Gossip