60-ish lady: If it weren’t for Dancing with the Stars, I don’t know what we’d be watching!
Whole Foods
Ridgewood, New Jersey
60-ish lady: If it weren’t for Dancing with the Stars, I don’t know what we’d be watching!
Whole Foods
Ridgewood, New Jersey
Young girl: Where is your husband?
Old woman: Oh, honey, my husband is up in heaven.
Young girl: I’m sorry… Did he get eaten by a crocodile?
Flight to Bermuda
Overheard by: elizabeth
Naked old man: You know, they say you really shouldn’t hang meats anymore.
Fully-clothed hipster: … Really?
YMCA locker room
Chicago, Illinois
Older lady: What’s a whiffy?
Man, confused: What’s… a whiffy?
Older lady: Right there! It says, ‘Free whiffy’ — W-I-F-I.
Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Overheard by: Jen
Loud old lady on cell: Hello! Sorry about before. I was so shocked someone called me that I pressed the wrong button!
Belgrave Line train
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Kiri
Bubbly girl: I am so happy now!
Bubbly friend, holding her hand: Me, too! I can’t believe it!
Old man, stopping them in hallway: What are you two so happy about?
Bubbly girl: We just hit on each other!
Old man: So, are you girlfriends now?
Bubbly friend: Yes, we are!
Old man, after long pause: Two girls together… That is a wonderful thing.
Peninsula College
Pt. Angeles, Washington
Overheard by: Gidget
Old man: … So I tell her, ‘Hey, it’s healthier than smoking, drinking… banging chicks…’ [Old women laugh.] But I could always mix the photography with the banging chicks and make some money on the side…
Panera Bread
Michigan
Overheard by: CDG
Old lady #1: There’s this neighborhood in Chicago that is absolutely infested with serial killers. Their solution to this was to build a Wal-Mart to bring rich, white people in.
Old lady #2: Did it help?
Old lady #1: No. One of the serial killer victims that was left for dead gave a description for a drawing, and nobody has seen him.
Old lady #2: Maybe he’s locked up during the day. Maybe he’s retarded and lives in a home and sneaks out only at night when no one will notice him.
Oakland, California
Overheard by: Perplexed Cal student
Crew member: Sir, you can’t stand here.
Old man, blocking walkway: [Ignores him.]Crew member: Sir! This is a walkway.
Old man: This is foolishness!
Passerby: Why don’t you just die, already?
Disneyland
Anaheim, California
Overheard by: uncomfortably waiting for the damn fireworks
Old lady on cell in crowded train: Yes, I’m here in a sardine tin, but everyone is really nice…
Tel-Aviv
Israel
Overheard by: claustrophobic
