Drunk man to man holding rolled-up newspaper: There's a kind of phallic-ness about it, a sort of masculine quality…
The Ship Inn, Southbank
Brisbane
Australia
Drunk man to man holding rolled-up newspaper: There's a kind of phallic-ness about it, a sort of masculine quality…
The Ship Inn, Southbank
Brisbane
Australia
8th grade health teacher, answering why you can't put a condom on when you're not erect: So…um, when it's not hard, it's just like there, you know, flapping in the wind…
Silver Spring, Maryland
Overheard by: nice thought…
Disheveled hipster: His dick was so crooked that it had, like, a knuckle!
Calgary
Canadia
Overheard by: Mrs The Experience
20-something loud man: I would not put my dick in her ear. That's how not interested I am.
Norman, Oklahoma
Girl #1: His penis was huge, like 12 inches! He was holding it and his hand looked so tiny!
Girl #2: No wonder he doesn't get any play, that shit hurts!
Girl #3: Yeah, it would like come out my ass!
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Just 2
Strange curly-haired girl: Make sure you make Edmund really hot.
Morose pale dark-haired girl: Why?
Strange curly-haired girl: Dude! Did you not read King Lear? Bitches were all over his dick!
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Anneliese
Four-year-old girl looking at Michelangelo’s David: Do you see the penis?
Nanny: Yes.
Four-year-old girl: I like the penis! Do you like the penis?
Nanny, turning around and walking away: There’s no good way to answer this.
Florence
Italy
Loud girl, as rest of the yoga class goes quiet after teacher rings bell: He was so fat I couldn't find his wiener!
Wyoming
Druggie talking about Italy: There were dicks coming out the walls everywhere!
Maine
Overheard by: abbitt the rabbitt
Crazy homeless lady to well-dressed businessman: Look at you with the coffee, you faggot, you just love dick in your ass!
Starbucks
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: trying to avoid her wrath
