Guy: Man, look at this guy! It's weird how they keep the eyelashes and hair on to keep them semi-human. You can see everything!
Girl: Um, are all penises so big?
Guy: I think it's due to preserving process.
Girl: I'm hungy.

Body Worlds Exhibit
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: 8lb Gem my ASS!!

Teenage girl: It's like every time we get close he backs out. I can't help to think it has something to do with his penis size.
Friend: Next time just throw him over your shoulder and take him back to the cave.

Santee, California

Overheard by: Story of my life

Guy to girl: Actually, no. I personally hate the idea of having a plastic trash bag on my cock.

Stow, Ohio

Overheard by: d

Teenage boy to teenage girl: I have a bigger penis than you.

Seattle, Washington

Flaming gay over speakerphone: Just like that boy from Miami last night, I tried to suck his dick like I was trying to win an Olympic gold medal. And that's the only ass I would lick even if it wasn't clean.

Washington, DC

Girl #1: It was the size of a Double-A battery.
Girl #2: Best sex ever, right?
Girl #1, shamefully: I don’t know what’s wrong with me!

Miami, Florida

Guy #1: What are those, zucchini?
Guy #2, with sandwich: No, they're cucumbers.
Girl: Oh please, they're like the same thing.
Guy #2: No, they're totally different. Not every phallic-shaped green vegetable is the same thing.
Girl (pauses): Why does everything have to be about penises with you?

San Diego, California

Overheard by: i just came here to clean the air ducts

Frat boy #1: Wait… so they didn't rape her?
Frat boy #2: No dude, turns out she had a penis. Now every time I see the girl I throw up a little in my mouth.

Laramie, Wyoming

HS boy #1: I love cheesecake in my mouth.
HS boy #2: You love dick in your mouth!!
HS boy #1: Well, yeah, if it has cheesecake on it!

Christiansburg, Virginia

Oversexed frat boy at house party: Yeah! We're gonna shoot 'em with our sperm cannons!

Providence, Rhode Island

Overheard by: Katie M