Girl #1: I can understand the idea behind having an affair…
Girl #2: Yeah, it’s the change of scenery.
Girl #3: The change of dick…
East Lansing, Michigan
Girl #1: I can understand the idea behind having an affair…
Girl #2: Yeah, it’s the change of scenery.
Girl #3: The change of dick…
East Lansing, Michigan
Man #1: So she looks up at me with this, look, right? And she grips my dick real hard and then gets this terrified look as she picks it off on my pubes…
Man #2: Oh, dude, I’m gonna vomit.
Man #1: It was a fucking dingleberry. And it wasn’t mine, dude.
Gym
Oregon
Blonde clone: It’s not that we’re both Leos. He’s just a dick.
Westfield Mall
San Diego, California
Coworker #1: I don’t even know what on a penis you would even pierce.
Coworker #2: I don’t, either. Let me text my brother-in-law and ask him. Maybe I can get him to send us a picture of his.
Eye clinic
Salt Lake City, Utah
Overheard by: also interested
Guy shouting out dorm window: We’ve got dicks! Yeahhh! Woo-hoo!
University of California, Davis
California
Four-year-old boy: So, girls have ‘ginas, and boys have penises?
Mom: Um, yes, hon.
Four-year-old boy: You have a ‘gina?
Mom: Yes, honey. Shhh.
Four-year-old boy: Girls at school have ‘ginas? Teachers have ‘ginas?
Mom: Yes, honey. Now shush.
Four-year-old boy, contemplating: I always wanted to see one of those.
Phoenix, Arizona
Dude #1: Do you trim your pubes?
Dude #2: Um, what? No… Why?
Dude #1: I do…
Dude #2: Okay…
Dude #1: And I think I trimmed them too much…
Dude #2: And?
Dude #1: Well, now my dick is itchy…
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: damn hiatus
Guy to girls: First I kicked her, then I put a dick in her ear.
Target
Menomonee Falls, Wisconsin
Overheard by: NU Rules
College guy: So, are you still a maybe-lesbian?
College girl, shrugging: I like penis much better. Chicks are crazy, but if one licks me, I’m not gonna complain if they’re hot.
University of Kentucky
Lexington, Kentucky
Teacher: Well, what do you think it would be like if you had a penis on your forehead? What would you do if you saw a pretty girl?
Kodiak High School
Kodiak, Alaska
