Chick: Man, I hate vacations! I always end up over-packing, and then I never get laid!
Kingston
Jamaica
Chick: Man, I hate vacations! I always end up over-packing, and then I never get laid!
Kingston
Jamaica
Girl on phone: I mean, his body was the best thing about him… Wait, that’s mean. I meant, physically his body was the best thing about him.
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Kid in cafeteria: Yeah, that was the night we watched Shrek and made love for the first time.
East Lansing, Michigan
Overheard by: Cammie
Professor: So, do you guys think fornication is man’s greatest pleasure?
First year Humanities class: [Embarrassed silence.]Brave student: Um… I don’t know about greatest… I mean, I like to eat.
Professor, slamming hands down on desk: I’ve been eating for 62 years, and I’ve never gotten an orgasm from it!
Richmond, Indiana
Girl: Okay, what other weird noises have I made? … I queefed…
Boyfriend: I helped.
Athens, Ohio
Girl #1: I just don’t think I’ll ever have sex without a condom.
Girl #2: Oh, please — that’s like saying you’re going to wait until marriage.
Mia’s Mexican Restaurant
Dallas, Texas
Guy to girls: First I kicked her, then I put a dick in her ear.
Target
Menomonee Falls, Wisconsin
Overheard by: NU Rules
Drunk guy to drunk girl: … But I haven’t even slept with you yet!
Ottawa, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: amused passerby
Girl: That orgy was like Legos — anyone and everyone on top of each other! You didn’t know what was what, who was who, where someone began or where did they end. It was just a big pile of human building blocks of pleasure.
Wonka Bar
Curitiba
Brazil
