Black people

Not As Fun As Quiet Contemplation Of Our Lord's Bounty, But Close

Middle-aged African American bus driver: So what if she is? I wear heels and I'm 5′8″. I wear them to church.
Prim-looking Caucasian female passenger: Oh, but at least at church you're sitting down.
Middle-aged African American bus driver: Oh no, honey. I'm up singing and dancing. I go to a black church. We get our praise on.
Prim-looking Caucasian female passenger (after uncomfortable pause): That sounds fun.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/370559900/enthusiasm-is-scary.html

Overheard by: yes it does

We All Do Our Part, Marcia

Black lady on cell: I mean, I’m out here stealing, too! I got a habit to support, too!

33 bus
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Just Call Me Tweedle Diva

Fat black chick: Yo, real women got curves, nigga.
Black queer: Yeah, bitch, curves. You only got one big curve! (traces circle in air)

Bus
Tallahassee, Florida

Overheard by: Dropper of Eaves

First Time in Massachusetts, Sweetie?

Black girl, after seeing renaissance a cappella group rehearsing: White people be doing the most ridiculous things! No offense…

Williams College
Williamstown, Massachusetts

Overheard by: None taken

My Train Is Like the Hotel California, Beeyotch.

Black woman #1: I hate when people wait to the last minute to try and get off at a stop.
Black woman #2: Mmm-hmm.
Black woman #1: I don't let them past if they try to do that shit.
Black woman #2: What you do?
Black woman #1: I'll push their mothafuckin' ass back on the train!

Subway
New York City

You Know It’s a Leather Apron, Right?

Big black guy on cell: Yeah, I wear the apron. But it comes off at night. Then we’ll see who hustles!

301 bus to Shoreline
Seattle, Washington

We Replaced Frank’s Regular Fellatrix with a Thumb-Sucker. Let’s Watch What Happens

Black woman #1: Did you suck your thumb growin’ up?
Black woman #2: No, I don’t think so.
Black woman #1: I did. Thumb suckers give the best blowjobs, you know.
Black man: Really?
Black woman #1 : Yeah. Once I was at a party with a friend, and we hooked up with a guy. Well… we went off together and had a test, if… you know what I mean… and he said I was the best — way better than my friend.
Black man: I’d like to try that test.

Mkt Frankford El subway stop
http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/03/see-freud-was-right.html

Overheard by: b&n guy

Or a First Edition of Great Expectations

Young black man: That’s the best gift you can give a brother — a fine Latina with B cups.

Orange Line bus
San Fernando Valley, California

Overheard by: suzy vapid

… Kindly Fellate Me, You Promiscuous Female Dog

Old black lady to friend: He had shit all fuckin’ dumped out all over the goddamned place, so I says, ‘What the fuck is you doin’, Raphael?’ And that mothafuckah says– [she looks around]. Shit, I forgot they’s white people up in here! Sorry, folks. So, Raphael had made such a terrible mess, so I asked him what he was doing, and he said…

Circle Centre Mall Concourse
Indianapolis, Indiana

Overheard by: Shatmandu

What Gets Out Blood?

Black lady #1: So I said, ‘What are you gonna do, hit me?’
Black lady #2: Mmm-hm.
Black lady #1: Then he really started to trip…
Black lady #2: Mmm.
Black lady #1: That’s when I looked him right in the eye and I said, ‘One of us is gonna die tonight.’

Joliet Mall
Joliet, Illinois

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