Black people

Tall black girl with fauxhawk: I don't know why everyone doesn't have an Asian fetish! They're pocket sized and stunning!

New Haven, Connecticut

Ghetto chick: It’s 10 minutes to midnight — I’m ’bout to turn into a bitch.

Magic Stick
Detroit, Michigan

Overheard by: Swells

Black guy to friends: I swear, every time I start talking to a girl she gets pregnant. (pause) Fo' real.

Bowling Green, Kentucky

Overheard by: You must have been doing more than talking

Girl #1: Why does Denzel Washington with a gun freak me out?
Girl #2: Because he’s black.

Movie Theater
Colorado

30-something black woman #1: The eye is superficial.
30-something black woman #2: Yeah, like 20-year-old white guys.

Community College
Columbus, Ohio

Overheard by: Madison

A+

Black student, casually: Wait, let me get this straight: he was going to participate, but he was late, so he decided to hate, and that’s what started this debate?
Teacher, baffled: Did you just rap that at me?

Columbia College Fiction Department
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: flunk_punk

Black chick: I’m sorry — I don’t have relations with inanimate objects!
Black guy: A rock is not inanimate…

Florida State University
Tallahassee, Florida

Overheard by: Iniego Strangelove

Pretty black girlfriend with super long hair: I have no vaginal memory.

Cornell University
Ithaca, New York

Ghetto girl: Yo, I can’t wait to get back to my dorm and just take a nap.
Ghetto guy: Heh… Well, you know, just don’t let that nap turn into, you know, some sleep… Y’know what I mean?
Ghetto girl: Yeah, I know what you mean.

Rutgers University
New Brunswick, New Jersey

Black girl to white friends: Black people want to be country, but we don't want to listen to the music.

Harvard Yard
Cambridge, Massachusetts

Overheard by: meems