Canadia

Teenage girl: You know what I wish I had?
Teenage boy, not paying attention: Uh-huh.
Teenage girl: A penis… I'd just go shoving it into people's butts.
Teenage boy: Wait… What?
Teenage girl, whispering to herself: I wish I had a penis.

Bus
Ottawa
Canadia

Chick: Gay is not an ethnicity! I don't care if they have their own mafia!

Outside Central Library
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia

Girl #1: Hey, you wanna grab dinner in a bit?
Girl #2: Sure, want to go to Risley?
Girl #1: Okay, I'm just going to warn you now, though I'm like a reaally slow eater…I only use my front teeth.

Halifax
Nova Scotia
Canadia

Guy: It was like trying to pull candy from a baby.

West Island
Montreal
Canadia

Professor: You take some guppies from different populations in Trinidad, put them into little plastic bags, shove them down your pants, and smuggle them through the airport back to the lab in California. At least, that?s what we did.

http://www.overheardatumbc.com

Guy to another: Running naked with a sword is just not a good idea.

Guelph
Canadia

Grandma: I don't like these halogen lightbulbs. They are ugly, like men's penises.

Calgary
Alberta
Canadia

Overheard by: Martha

Customer: Do you have any tea that’s like coffee only it isn’t caffeinated like coffee… But it tastes like coffee?
Barista: Uh, you mean decaf coffee?
Customer: Yes! That’s exactly what I want. I’ll have a decaf coffee.

Red Brick Coffee Pub
Guelph
Ontario, Canadia

Hipster: I want to start spitting, so I’ve decided to take up smoking.

Canadia

Guy #1: Are you gonna get tested?
Guy #2: I think the Lauren thing pretty much takes care of it.
Guy #3: You should still get tested.
Guy #2: Yeeeah, but I don’t like getting blood taken from me and I don’t have any like, symptoms, so…
Guy #3: Well, I haven’t seen your penis.

Simon Fraser University
British Columbia
Canadia