Canadia

Girl: Oh, hold on, I have to ejaculate my disk.

Montreal
Quebec
Canadia

Very drunk girl, loudly and excitedly: That was the longest pee I ever did! Like seriously, I went into the bathroom and started peeing. Gavin came in, washed his hands, then left, and I was still peeing!

Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: Mandy

Korean girl: You know, I can’t tell us apart, either.
Chinese girl: Yeah, I just think everyone’s Chinese.

High school bathroom
Newmarket, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: slightly relieved

13-year-old blonde: So then he was all “I told you it wasn't mine!”
13-year-old brunette: Ohmigod, how could he do that?
13-year-old blonde: I know! It was, like, “did you or didn't you sleep with him?” He's not even gay!

Canadia

Overheard by: Laura

Creepy guy: Hey, Joey*.
Joey: Yeah?
Creepy guy: Have you ever put pee in a Super Soaker before?
Joey: Yeah.
Friend: What?
Girl: Ewww.
Friend: What does it feel like if you’re sprayed?
Creepy guy, shrugs: Kinda tingles.

Geography class, All Saints High School
Whitby, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: freshman whisperer

Drunken teenage girl, dancing down the street: I taste like fucking condoms!

Toronto, Canadia

Sunday school teacher: We're going to play a fun game next! Does anybody want to guess what it is?
Five-year-old student: Take of our shirts and pants?
Sunday school teacher: No!

Sunday School Classroom
Fredericton
Canadia

Overheard by: Andrew

Wadsworth character in the movie Clue: You see, my secret is that my wife was a socialist.
Girl watching the film: So, does that mean that she was a prostitute or something?

French class, All Saints High School
Whitby, Ontario
Canadia

(during a film in a movie theater)
Girl #1 (whispering): Ow, something's itching me–I think there's something in my bra. (gasps) Oh my god!
Girl #2: What is it!?
Girl #1: I just found a condom in my bra and I think it was from last night but I don't remember putting it there!

Ontario
Canadia

Girl #1: Why is it that so many midgets end up getting into acting? There must be a shortage of midget actors…
Girl #2: Shortage?

Sault Ste Marie
Ontario
Canadia