Drunk frat boy: Shiiit, I’m God! I’m God, and I’ve seen so much asscrack!
Brown University
Providence, Rhode Island
Drunk frat boy: Shiiit, I’m God! I’m God, and I’ve seen so much asscrack!
Brown University
Providence, Rhode Island
Business professor: What time is the final next week?
Students: Monday from 1 to 3pm.
Business professor: No! That can’t be right — the school would not give a 3-hour exam!
Student: I never talked about vaginas nearly this much until I came to Smith.
Cushing/Emerson dining hall, Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts
First year girl: I wouldn’t let my mom kiss me goodnight if I had a vagina for a nose, anyways.
Queen’s University
Ontario
Canadia
College girl: We blew a fuse in our room last night. Just in our room, not the rest of the hall.
Science professor: And what did you do to solve this problem?
College girl: I cried.
Professor: That doesn't solve the problem!
College girl: Well, half of my hair was dry and the other half wasn't!
Professor: You were not bilaterally symmetrical. That can be a problem.
Keuka College
New York
Overheard by: Rachel Bz.
Bro: We don't put shaving cream on our dicks, we put it on our faces.
Illinois State University
Overheard by: Eddy
Very annoyed guy eating breakfast: I love the smell of hatred in the morning.
Confused girl sitting next to him: Is it anything like coffee?
Very annoyed guy eating breakfast: What? No, it's nothing like coffee. God, you're so stupid.
College Dining Hall
Albuquerque, New Mexico
Female professor: She was a lesbian…
Male student: Yeah, she was.
Female professor: But he turned her straight with his manliness…
Male student: Yeah, he did.
Appalachian State University
Boone, North Carolina
College chick: Oh my god! Girls are, like, so racist.
University of Washington
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Jackie
Professor, in monotone voice: I think we're all familiar with merry-go-rounds. They're objects in playgrounds that rotate at relatively high speeds, and we put our children on them.
Millersville University
Millersville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Tyler G
