Extremely drunk man: You know, I don’t think prime numbers are going to introduce us to aliens… But I think Chuck Berry will.

The Old Hole
Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: E

Student: The trophoblast looks like a teething ring!
Sex ed teacher: Yes. It looks like a teething ring, but it's not.

UW Rock County
Janesville, Wisconsin

Overheard by: Akuaku

Physics professor: Hey! Listen up! I’m tired of some of you walking out or ignoring me when we talk about the Big Bang Theory. I’m not telling you God doesn’t exist, so don’t get your panties in a bunch! You! Sit down! Let me finish!

Kent State University
Kent, Ohio

Girl #1: And I was like: “How many depressed lab rats do you have to weigh and kill to figure that out?”
Girl #2: What?
Girl #3: 37.5, apparently.

Macalester College
St. Paul, Minnesota

Recent college grad: Wait, you mean elephants are mammals?!

York, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: not a mammal either

Teacher: You can use stethoscopes to listen to water in trees. You should listen to thin trees and trees with less bark.
Student: Should it be hardwood or softwood?
Teacher: Softwood. You can't beat softwood.

Alexandria, Virginia

60-something guy, earnestly, to table full of seemingly level-headed adults: They're going to turn the moon into a weapon, the most powerful weapon ever…

Reno, Nevada

Overheard by: mini-me

Student on bike to another: The problem with string theory nowadays is that everyone just wants to get into it.


Overheard by: Anti-Math

College girl #1: Eating raw fish makes you super fertile.
College girl #2: Really?
College girl #1: Yeah, thats why I get pregnant so much.

Japanese Restaurant
Richmond, Virginia

Physics professor: First we’ll put it in the A hole and then we’ll put it in the other hole.

Allegheny College