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Female student #1: I think Picasso painted them as nudes to liberate women; to show that they're human beings.
Female student #2: I think he just liked tits.

French Class
UMass, Amherst

Grown-ass man about passerby: If you're carrying enough shit to require cargo pockets you should just get a goddamn purse. That's why I admire the gays, they don't pull punches.

St Petersburg, Florida

Overheard by: Dr. Bananagrabber

Girl: The moral of the story is: “Don't give blow jobs with a dislocated jaw!”

Rhodes University
South Africa

We Heart Zippy Unironically

Teen prep: Shell is a lot more expensive than GetGo these days. (later) I'm missing a lifetime movie right now!
Father: She's like Zippy the Pinhead!

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Shoppy

Guy: So they said to her: “Carrie, you can’t wear a head lamp! That’s a really obvious sign!” And she said: “Yeah! Of adventure!”

Mukilteo Ferry, Washington

Overheard by: Just Me

Teacher: Do you have to go potty?
Two-year-old girl: I don't go potty anymore; I listen to music.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/420122010/i-listen-to-music-to-make-potty-time-easier.html

Overheard by: wayzata

Professor, after pushing back mid-term: Isn't that, quote-unquote, orgasmic?

College of William and Mary

Lesbian bartender: I am so mad right now.
Gay bartender (affectionately touching her cheek): Awwww…honey… You shaved!

Boston, Massachusetts

Six-year-old #1: Did you know that we’ve kissed before and we’re not even family?
Six-year-old #2: Yeah, in a hot tub!

Casselman
Ontario
Canadia

Flamboyant guy: What? You mean for 20 years I've been believing that smoking pot will make you retarded?
Blonde: Your mom's a liar. It's just night tremors and shit.

London
Canadia