Think Of Purgatory As a Drive-Through Soul Wash

Professor: So, basically god has to suppress the gag reflex when he looks at you; but it's okay because he loves you anyway.

University of Akron
Akron, Ohio

Overheard by: Rebecca

Posted on November 15, 2018
Colleges & Universities, Feelings, God, Ohio, Teachers, Weirdness

He'd Only Stop Loving You If I Were a Fetus.

Little girl: And god loves everybody. God even loves you.
Scary little boy: I'm going to kill you.
Little girl: God will love you, even if you do.

Round Rock, Texas

Posted on October 24, 2018
Feelings, God, Kids, Murder, Texas, Threats

And Neither Could God

College student: So first my girlfriend and I split, then I got accepted into the frat, and then I found god…I couldn't handle spring break after that weekend.

Georgetown University
Washington, DC

Posted on June 20, 2018
Colleges & Universities, Default, Education, God, Relationships, Students, Washington, DC

Pythagoras Is a Jealous God, People

Math teacher: If you fuck with numbers, you're fucking with god! And people get killed for that shit!

University of Miami, Florida

Overheard by: Tormented Math Student

Posted on August 2, 2017
Colleges & Universities, Default, Education, Florida, God, Sex, Teachers, Violence

So, Why’d God Break Your Hip, Myrtle?

Old lady #1: … And now he’s crippled!
Old lady #2: Well, of course he is. That’s what God does to people who get divorced.
Old lady #1: That’s true.

Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Overheard by: Voudou

Posted on January 31, 2017
God, Maladies, Old folks, Relationships, Wisconsin

This Site Thanks God for Crazies

Crazy: … And we got to thank God! Thank him for the babies, for all our little children…! And we got to thank Him for creating sexual intercourse so we can make those babies! And we got to thank God for French fries!

UC Berkeley
California

Overheard by: Lauren agrees with this Man