Retail employee to coworkers: I once saw a man having sex with a chicken in Haiti, and the chicken was crowing…
White Plains, New York
Overheard by: Dubpsfinezt228
Retail employee to coworkers: I once saw a man having sex with a chicken in Haiti, and the chicken was crowing…
White Plains, New York
Overheard by: Dubpsfinezt228
Construction worker #1: There's a lot of sick bastards out there.
Construction worker #2: Not like when we were growing up.
Construction worker #3: That's because the country's got 300 million people now. When we was growing up it only had 150 million. That's why you got three times the number of crazies now.
Oceanside, New York
Hot girl: Wait, we just had sex?
Hot guy: We just finished having sex like five minutes ago, do you not remember any of it?
Hot girl: Nope.
Hot guy: Actually, we just finished like thirty seconds ago…
Oxford
England
Girl to friends: So, when I was 6, I took my golden retriever's rectal temperature with a tire pressure gauge.
Nice Restaurant
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Daughter: You don't remember his mom?
Mother: Not the one with the cool back hair.
Canton, Ohio
Overheard by: Kaylah
Male ethics professor: I was generally seen as a spoiled little bitch.
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Girl: Hey, do you remember that show The Littlest Hobo?
Guy: Yeah.
Girl: That's all. I just wanted to remind you of it.
Toronto
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Meech
Guy #1: Hey man, how've you been?
Guy #2: Aren't you supposed to be dead?
Chicago, Illinois
Statistics teacher: There is a correlation between cats and happiness. Cats make people happy. But not all cats. I still have nightmares about some cats. When I was a little girl, there was this cat, Greta, who lived outdoors. I wanted to pet her, but she scratched up my whole arm and got her claws into my protoplasm!
Atlanta, Georgia
Teenage boy: Hey, James, don't you remember when you stuck Smarties down your shirt and rubbed them on your nipples?
On the Bus
Canadia
Overheard by: Kels
