Drunk 40-year-old dude #1, standing in line for the bathroom: Well, there are four sinks. We only need two with the number of people I've seen wash their hands.
Drunk 40-year-old dude #2: Yeah. There was this one time I was peeing in the sink at home, and my wife walked in. She was pissed. Good times.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/373685741/why-do-people-think-this-is-okay.html
Overheard by: slight overshare
Wife to husband who has been chatting with stranger: Who was that?
Husband: Remember those Dos Equis commercials with the most interesting man in the world?
Wife: Yes.
Husband: That was his antithesis.
Northern Michigan
Overheard by: Kaptain Equinox
20-something guy, about his sushi: This takes me back to when I used to live in Japan.
Brunette: When did you ever live there?
20-something guy: No, I mean in my past life.
Brunette: What makes you think you were Japanese?
20-something guy: Because ever since I was little I have always loved seafood.
Brunette: … Maybe you were a fish.
20-something guy: Not cool.
Sushi restaurant
Worcester, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Wallflower
Druggie talking about Italy: There were dicks coming out the walls everywhere!
Maine
Overheard by: abbitt the rabbitt
Enthusiastic elderly Southern woman: There was BBs flying all through the winders, I was so upset I cried. I wasn't going to church at that time, but I went to Wal-Mart.
McDonald's
Richmond, Kentucky
Overheard by: Akilah
Mom to little girl: No, we are not getting Eliza* a present. She hasn't given you a present ever since the elephant incident.
Disneyland
Anaheim, California
Bro #1: Dude, now that you're here…
Bro #2: We can start making some fucking memories!
Michigan State University
Woman: I orgasmed here once.
Friend, cheerfully: Oh, I've done that several times!
James Brown Arena
Augusta, Georgia
Overheard by: Annissa
Drunk woman: … And that’s how my parents hooked up! My dad was a drunk dialer!
Outside George’s
Waco, Texas
Guy: The only reason I remember the day I got accepted to Cornell is because it’s the only time I ever walked in on my parents having sex.
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/03/saturnalia.html
Overheard by: doug
