Guy to friend: So, when you shouted “god!” you really meant “whore”, right?
University of Maryland
Five-year-old son to father: I wonder what zebra farts smell like?
The National Zoo
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Kat
Girl to friends, on third night of semester: Wouldn't you want to have sex the second night back?
Fitchburg State University
Fitchburg, Massachusetts
Guy at party #1: Hey, hold on, did that baby get naked?
Guy at party #2: Yeah, man, it's hot in here.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Meech
Hot girl: Wait, we just had sex?
Hot guy: We just finished having sex like five minutes ago, do you not remember any of it?
Hot girl: Nope.
Hot guy: Actually, we just finished like thirty seconds ago…
Oxford
England
Sorostitute, about bender: So what time does it start?
Frat boy: I've set my alarm for 9 am. We'll start then. We've got two kegs in and two cases of tequila.
Sorostitute: I'm such a lightweight. I'll probably be passed out by 11. My roommate said “please don't die. If you die, call me.”
Penn State University
Teenager #1: Why does the train keep stopping?
Teenager #2: Because it has to stop at train stations.
Teenager #1: Ohmigod, train stations are so random!
Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: Angela
Dumb freshman girl: Why does being castrated make your voice high?
Friar professor: Talk to someone after class.
Seattle University
Washington
Overheard by: facepalm
