Teachers

Professor, discussing an 18th century painting: Now, it is important to remember that at this time women did not wear panties. This is a beaver shot par excellence!

San José State University
California

Teacher: See, adjectives are boring old turtles.
Students: Uhhh.
Teacher: But participles are like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!

Marshall High School
Virginia

Overheard by: amused student….

Biology teacher: [badly draws a woman singing into a microphone, which looks suspiciously like a woman about to give head] If you take this, for example…
[class laughs]Biology teacher: [steps away from board and sees what class is laughing about] Uh…[erases drawing]… We’re just not going to draw today.

Connecticut

Education professor: Marshmallows are not alive… are they?

Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts

Teacher: You know, I’ve never known two teenage boys that wanted to be locked in a soundproof room together before.

Escuela Campo Alegre Caracas
Venezuela

Overheard by: Jillian

White teacher: Time to yell grades! These are the good ones: Smith, Jameson, De-Jesus…
Asian kid, whispering to friend: Isn’t it supposed to be Degesis?
White kid, to teacher: Did you just say ‘De-Jesus‘?
White teacher: I’m white.

Columbia, New York

Overheard by: Father Seraph

Torts professor: S-and-M aside, you don’t go out and purchase pain and suffering.

http://overheardinlawschool.blogspot.com/2007/05/what-about-law-school-tuition.html

Overheard by: bh

Acting professor: We just tweaked a few things to make it Christmassy and kidnapped Santa.

Point Park University
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: ZB

Professor with Smarties taped to pants: Anyone wanna take a guess at what my costume is?
Girl in back: Firefighter!

University of Delaware
Delaware

Professor: The best time to study geography is in the morning after you've done the “walk of shame.” It will help you to keep your mind off of what you've done.” (cracks up) That's good shit.

Geography Classroom
Michigan State