Mom with two kids in tow: You guys can’t take Mommy’s cell phone out of her purse anymore, okay? It’s very important to leave Mommy’s cell phone in her purse. [Stops suddenly] Okay, where did we put Mommy’s purse?
Sam’s Club
Virginia
Mom with two kids in tow: You guys can’t take Mommy’s cell phone out of her purse anymore, okay? It’s very important to leave Mommy’s cell phone in her purse. [Stops suddenly] Okay, where did we put Mommy’s purse?
Sam’s Club
Virginia
College student: I mean, really — who would have sex with an 18-year-old?
University of Virginia
Charlottesville, Virginia
Dude: And so you go to sleep all relaxed, but when you wake up, they cut off part of your penis!
University of Mary Washington
Fredericksburg, Virginia
16-year-old female lifeguard: Hey, I’m running to 7-Eleven to get a Slurpee… Anyone want anything?
14-year-old male lifeguard: Yeah, can I get some watermelon Bubble Yum and… [lowers voice and looks around suspiciously] … some condoms?
16-year-old female lifeguard: Um…
Vienna, Virginia
Chatty female college student to friends: So it was sort of like that, except instead of a q-tip, it was a vacuum. There was no scraping at all.
Friend: Wow… that's crazy.
Harrisonburg, Virginia
Chick: … And that’s why I’m scared of horses! They’re so mean!
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: Taylor Boatright
Poetry girl: I've been so depressed all weekend.
Poetry guy: Well, why have you been so depressed?
Poetry girl: I wrote this poem about divorce, so I was thinking about divorce all weekend, and it just made me so depressed.
(long pause)
Poetry girl, loudly: Can you tell me about the human condition? I mean, can you really tell me about the human condition?
George Mason University
Fairfax County, Virginia
Overheard by: The Bu
The pilot is sitting in the cockpit making clicking noises and singing in a falsetto voice.
Flight attendant: Are you high?
On the runway
Dulles, Virginia
Overheard by: first class is scary
Dude on cell: Well, I’m either gonna go see the hypnotist or masturbate.
James Madison University
Harrisonburg, Virginia
Overheard by: asm
Girl to friend: I just don't understand why people don't want to be covered in spaghetti!
University of Virginia
Overheard by: MW
