Boyfriend: I only cheated on you with one girl but you cheated on me with three guys… at the same time!
Ohio State University
Overheard by: JooSki
Boyfriend: I only cheated on you with one girl but you cheated on me with three guys… at the same time!
Ohio State University
Overheard by: JooSki
Girl #1: I can understand the idea behind having an affair…
Girl #2: Yeah, it’s the change of scenery.
Girl #3: The change of dick…
East Lansing, Michigan
Female customer: I would never do anything with someone other than my boyfriend.
Male customer: You cheated on your husband!
Female customer: I wasn’t in love with my husband.
Visible Voice Books
Cleveland, Ohio
Girl: I like you and all, but you’re married.
Dude: My wife and I have an open marriage.
Girl: Is that would she say if I asked her if we could sleep together?
Dude: Probably not. That’s why we’re not gonna ask her.
Sun Prairie, Wisconsin
Preppy guy on cell: So, you’re pissed. I guess ’cause I lied. Or, yeah, I understand — ’cause I had sex with someone else last night. What was I supposed to do, wake up and say, ‘Oh, hey, I have a girlfriend’ to her? … Look, babe, I love you, but I’m 19 and I’m human.
Drunk guy from dorm window: And an asshole!
Boston College
Newton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Drew
(40-something man was hitting on young clerk when his wife comes up)
Man: I honestly think man wasn't meant to be faithful. We're all so sexual.
Wife: Did you forget I was here?
Man: I'll be in the car in a second.
(she leaves store)
Man, after looking back at clerk: Please. She loves getting pimped out to my friends.
Bookstore
Ocala, Florida
Man to friend: She makes me want to cheat on my wife in front of my wife.
Exchange Place, New Jersey
Overheard by: John
Girl on phone: Yes, I know you love me, but I'm not going to keep coming to the house you share with your wife to give you blowjobs whenever you want! (pause) You need to find somewhere else for us to do it.
London
England
35-year-old man: Do you know what I did for you? I left my home, my wife. I cheated because I was cheated on, I know what that's like. You're turning 30, you need a man, what's a woman at 30? You're alone!
28-year-old woman: You're having a midlife crisis. Women don't get those. I'm there for you, like, “you should stop at three drinks because you're a terrible drunk.”
35-year-old man: You'd do that for me?
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Matt
Woman on phone, sobbing and screaming: We have two beautiful children, and you want to stick your dick in someone else?
Disneyland
Anaheim, California
