WASP lady: I bought this ring here and it really smells. Every time I put my hand up to my face it makes me want to vomit.
Jewelry shop
Alexandria, Virginia
WASP lady: I bought this ring here and it really smells. Every time I put my hand up to my face it makes me want to vomit.
Jewelry shop
Alexandria, Virginia
Girl on phone with boyfriend: I’m in such a bad mood, I don’t even know! When I get home, you better not have a smile on your face or I will slap yo’ ass. Misery loves company up in here, bitch!
Williamsburg, Virginia
Overheard by: C. Barreto
Disappointed blonde: … But it’s Porn Sunday!
Radford University
Virginia
Woman: Is he mad that his girl’s a whore?
Man: Yeah.
Winchester, Virginia
Guy to friend: You open the Bible and you tell me where it says that Jesus Christ says it’s okay to smoke crack!
Arlington, Virginia
Overheard by: Passing Jogger
Preppy teen girl #1: Well, do you like her?
Preppy teen girl #2: I mean, yeah, I like her… But she has got to do something about her mustache!
Newport News, Virginia
Overheard by: Sam
Drunk chick: I wouldn’t have known I hooked up with anyone if I hadn’t found his swipe card in my bra on the floor… Should I send him an e-mail?
Washington and Lee University
Lexington, Virginia
Fourth grade student: All the guys in France have big schlongs.
Virginia
Waitress indicating empty seat: Would she like some dessert when she gets back?
Recently abandoned old man: No. She wasn’t feeling good so she went to the Hallmark Store.
Atlas Diner, Strawbridge
Virginia Beach, Virginia
Employee #1: Do you know what the problem is with rice cakes?
Employee #2: What?
Employee #1: There’s no meat in them.
Super Target
Virginia
Overheard by: Brian
