For the Last Time, Tommy, It's Not Even Goat-Stabbing Season

Four-year-old to mother: How do you kill a goat? With a gun?
Mother: Well…
Four-year-old, after epiphany: Or a sword!

Tacoma, Washington

Overheard by: Charlie G.

Posted on August 11, 2011
Animals, Kids, Moms, Murder, Questions, Washington

Then Follow Me!

Screechy woman: We need to figure out what the frack we're doing for Canada day!
Quiet man: Probably sit around and watch the fireworks.
Screechy woman: Noooo, that's such a waste!
Quiet man: (silence)
Screechy woman: I have the day off, yeeeaahhh!
Quiet man: (silence)
Screechy woman: Do you think pigs would eat other pigs?
Quiet man, after long pause: I really don't know.

London
Canadia

Overheard by: Watcher of Fireworks

Posted on July 19, 2011
Animals, Canadia, Guys, Leisure, Questions, Weirdness, Women

Like Hamburger Comes from the Pig Part

Eight-year-old boy to mother browsing meat counter at the grocery store: Mom, what's veal?
Mother: It's just another kind of meat.
Eight-year-old boy: But what kind of animal does it come from?
Mother, motioning to her chest area: Oh, I think it's from the lamb part of the cow.

Toronto
Canadia

Posted on June 19, 2011
Animals, Canadia, Food, Kids, Moms, Questions, Shopping

Haiti's Funniest Home Videos Is the Stuff Of Nightmare

Retail employee to coworkers: I once saw a man having sex with a chicken in Haiti, and the chicken was crowing…

White Plains, New York

Overheard by: Dubpsfinezt228

Posted on June 15, 2011
Animals, Memory lane, New York, Sex

Note to Self: Proofread Bucket List

Hopeful tourist to hotel employee: We came to see kangaroos in their natural habitat, which way is the outback?

Hotel Front Desk
Vienna
Austria

Overheard by: flamingriver

Posted on June 6, 2011
Animals, Europe, Geography, Questions, Tourists

Did You Shave It?

Girl #1 : I found a bearded dragon in my brothers closet last night!
Girl #2 : A real dragon?
Girl #1 : No, a lizard.
Girl #2 : Oh.

Secondary School
Nanaimo District
Canadia.

Posted on June 2, 2011
Animals, Canadia, Girls, Questions, Weirdness

Interestingly, There's No Black-and-White Answer to That.

Five-year-old son to father: I wonder what zebra farts smell like?

The National Zoo
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Kat

Posted on May 14, 2011
Animals, Kids, Questions, Sensory experiences, Washington, DC

We're Gonna Get Along Swimmingly, Mate.

Drunk #1: I'm telling you man, these fucking guys raped a fish.
Drunk #2: What fucking guys?
Drunk #1: In Africa. They raped a fish. That's why the fish have to wear condoms, so they don't have fish babies with bulging human eyes.
Drunk #3: How the fuck did we get from talking about his (gestures towards drunk #2) sister's hairy vulva to fish rape?
Drunk #4: How the fuck would you even rape a fish anyway?
Drunk #1: Gut it and wank with its corpse?
Drunk #2, knowingly: Or freeze it and push it up your arse.

Leamington Spa
England

Overheard by: Bleep