Animals

Dad to little girl sitting on railing, watching sea lions: You fall down, that's it. If you fall down, I'm not helping you. (pause) And the sea lion's gonna eat you.

Pier 39
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: Paulo

Girl #1: You can't save every animal in the world.
Girl #2: You don't think you could save every animal in the world? We could go to the rain forest!
Girl #3: I want to go to the rain forest and save the monkeys and Chihuahuas!

Merced, California

Enthusiastic little boy, entering restaurant with parents: Smells like snakes in here!

Restaurant
Charlottesville, Virginia

Overheard by: pasquinn

Girl #1: Okay, so my sister was watching Pokemon the other day, and asked me a question about it, and I don't know what to tell her.
Girl #2: Well, what is it?
Girl #1: She was wondering, since there are no animals in the show, like cows or anything, if when they ate meat they were eating Pokemon.
Girl #2: Don't tell her the truth, it'll break her nerdy little heart.

Utah

Little boy: Mommy, if a turtle has no shell is it naked or homeless?
Mother: It would be dead, sweetheart.
Little boy: That's sad, mommy.
Mother: No, it isn't, dear. Come on, this is our stop.

Metro
Washington, DC

Elderly woman to woman across aisle: You can't trust crabs. Crabs are sneaky.

DMV
Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: What about other sneaky crustaceans?

Guy #1: No man, I told her I don't want kids. I just want dogs.
Guy #2: Then why not just have kids?

Manhattan, New York

Woman walking Corgi shouting to woman walking King Charles Spaniel: He wants to meet a licky dog.

Brookline, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Aunt Kelly

Blackjack player, after dealer busted: Now the horse is on the other foot!

Lake Tahoe, Nevada

Overheard by: Charles Alverson

Man to small daughter: Do you know why they cut the elephants' tusks off? It's so they won't poke or hurt anybody. (pause) Just like we cut your fangs off when you were young.

St. Louis Zoo
St. Louis, Missouri

Overheard by: Katie