Little boy to tour bus driver: Thank you.
Bus driver: Now that's a sign of good parenting.
Parent, as he steps off bus: Yeah. We're takin' him on a whiskey tour.
Jack Daniels Distillery
Lynchburg, Tennessee
Little boy to tour bus driver: Thank you.
Bus driver: Now that's a sign of good parenting.
Parent, as he steps off bus: Yeah. We're takin' him on a whiskey tour.
Jack Daniels Distillery
Lynchburg, Tennessee
City bus driver, at the beginning of his shift: My name is Bob, I'll be your new bus driver. I'll be taking this bus down University to… some mall. I don't know where we're going, heh. I'm new. I will drive very carefully… unless you piss me off.
Des Moines, Iowa
Bus driver: So, I heard the last 9 bus was full and a lot of you had to wait for this one. If you're angry about it, you can honk this bus' horn. Really. I don't want you leaving here mad at Bloomington transit.
Bloomington, Indiana
Overheard by: Honked the Horn
Old lady to female bus driver: I need to get laid.
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: exactly
Guy #1: Just admit it, man.
Guy #2: Admit what? That I'm great and wonderful and perfect in every way shape and form? Alright, I'm great and wonderful and perfect in every way shape and form!
Guy #1: No, admit that you're crazier than me!
Guy #2: Yeah, well…you're just Mr “Too sexy for my shirt,” and I'm Mr “Too sexy for my life,” but seriously, I'm so smart and everyone loves me.
Guy #3: You're just lyin' to yourself, man.
Guy #2: I'm too sexy for the world! That's just the way it is. I'm the next Albert Einstein. Everyone will soon realize that they love me. You all know that I'm right, so say that I am always right! You're dumb and I'm smart. Everyone loves me.
Bus driver: Will you guys be quiet? No one wants to hear this!
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Lulu
Male high school student, nonchalantly: I got a new phone; this one can take videos and stuff. It's pretty cool.
School bus driver, in hushed, dramatic tone: Technology is god on earth.
School Bus
Southern California
Bus driver: Folks, this just in from the weather service, I just thought I'd pass it along to you all. Don't let all these clouds fool you, there's a high heat warning in effect for Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, gumdrops, and…snow cones, so if you have any of those items, you'd better keep them inside. That's all.
Bus #17
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: The Redhead
Driver to people leaving the bus at the university: Buh-bye, have a great day, kids. Enjoy your lessons…bye now. Do your homework. Work hard on your exams so you don't become a bus driver! Bye-bye, everyone!
56 Bus
Leeds
England
