And Everyone Lived Happily Ever After

20-something #1: So I saw the earrings on his nightstand and I took them.
20-something #2: What? You really took them? Why?
20-something #1: Because she took two of his t-shirts when she left the other night, and left her earrings behind so she would have an excuse to see him again! It's like Fatal Attraction!
20-something #2: But you took her earrings, and still spent the night with him after she did! What the hell? (pause) Are those them?
20-something #1: Yeah.
20-something #2: They're cute.

San Francisco, California

Overheard by: A Cheek

Posted on January 9, 2009
Beauty, California, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Movies, Questions

It's It

College dude to girl: Yeah, so they tagged my penis…

UC Irvine
Irvine, California

Posted on January 6, 2009
California, Colleges & Universities, Default, Guys, Penis, Students, Weirdness, Words

Then I'm Getting a Bathing Suit With a Skirt

Five-year-old boy sitting in a shopping cart: Gi-ant vul-va! Gi-ant vul-va!
Mommy: Here's a chocolate truffle.

Whole Foods
Santa Monica, California

Posted on January 6, 2009
Body parts, California, Candy, Default, Guys, Kids, Moms

Translation: He Came, I Didn't

Girl to friend: He said that I was his new BFF. “Best fuck forever”! I said that was sweet, and gave him a little kiss.

San Diego, California

Overheard by: TrixChix

Posted on December 26, 2008
California, Compliments, Default, Feelings, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, Sex, Words

…the Kaaba Of All Television

Persian princess: That's why I really want to be into journalism. I think that being somewhere where there's, like, a tsunami or earthquake is really exciting to me…
Horny first date: Yeah, yeah…
Persian princess (breathy pause): I guess I just really want to work for MTV.

Santana Row
San Jose, California

Overheard by: Demitra

Posted on December 24, 2008
California, Compare and contrast, Default, Feelings, Girls, Guys, Jobs & Careers, Pop culture, Wishes

…And I Knew I Was in Love

Hipster on cell: And then she started talking about trouser gravy…

Mesa College
San Diego, California

Overheard by: Tish

Posted on December 15, 2008
California, Clothes, Colleges & Universities, Cum, Default, Hipsters, On the phone, Words

See? Was That So Hard, Pancake-Chest?

Girl #1: Sometimes I judge you silently in my head.
Girl #2: Yeah, everyone does that. I think people should start saying what they're really thinking. We should all have running monologues about what's going through our heads.
Girl #1: Really?
Girl #2: Yeah. Like, this one time, me and my friend….
Girl #1: I think you're a bitch.

Starbucks
San Jose, California

Overheard by: Robert

Posted on December 6, 2008
California, Default, Feelings, Girls, Insults, Restaurants, Violence

Sounds Great. Really. My People Will Call Your People

Drunk girl: You cough up a ring, and I'll cough up my vagina.

Sacramento, California

Posted on December 5, 2008
California, Default, Drunks, Girls, Health & Hygiene, Vagina, Weirdness

The ACLU Defends the Constitution? What Kinda Commie Shit Is That?!

Volunteer #1: We can't be selling this music, it's devil worship.
Volunteer #2: Well, that's the ACLU. The ACLU ought to be abolished. They're why there's all this stuff around.
Customer: Why are you getting rid of that? Don't you think people ought to be able to choose for themselves?
Volunteer #2: Harry Potter is a witch!
Customer: I think we ought to get rid of Bush and Cheney, put them in jail–they're mass murderers!
Volunteers #1 & #2: (silence)

Joshua Tree Thrift Shop
California

Overheard by: Celeste Mann

Posted on December 1, 2008
California, Compare and contrast, Coworkers, Crimes, Customers, Default, Evil, Murder, Music, Politics, Religious fanatics, Stores, Weirdness

Disney's Dumpo Has Been Box Office Gold for Decades

Mom to toddler in stroller: What was your favorite part of the circus?
Toddler in stroller: The elephants pooping!

Disneyland
Anaheim, California

Posted on November 22, 2008
Animals, California, Default, Kids, Moms, Poop, Questions, Tourist attractions