Teacher: So, what would you like to put on your poster?
Third grade boy: Glitter!
Third grade girl: Gore!
Acting Class
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Teacher: If there's a bee flying around the classroom, I don't want you to freak out. But, if you get stung by a bee, I want you to jump up, scream, run for the door, run into the door because you didn't open it, scream again, and run out. If you're going to disturb the class, we might as well get a laugh out of it.
Bristol, Vermont
Overheard by: Misaki
Professor, at 8 am: If coffee doesn't work, drink RedBull. But if that doesn't work, I suggest amphetamines or heroin.
Class, SUNY
Purchase, New York
Overheard by: Jessica
Professor: Are there any questions before we begin the final?
Girl: Can we tear pages out of the exam?
Professor: Yes, we have the technology to reassemble it. (waves stapler around)
Managerial Accounting Class
Santa Barbara, California
Overheard by: Ariel
Teacher: Who lived at Monticello?
Student: Darth Vader!
History Classroom
Idaho
Professor: We must go out and procreate!
Swedish History Class
Uppsala University
Sweden
Overheard by: Amused Exchange Student
Midshipman: It's midgets, sir.
Skeptical lieutenant: Is it like albino midgets or something?
Midshipman: No, sir, regular midgets.
Skeptical lieutenant: Oh well…okay, then.
NROTC Classroom
Atlanta, Georgia
Professor: So, when you walk out of here in four years with a BJ under your belt, you'll be more experienced and know the basics.
Journalism Class
Ottawa, Ontario
Canadia
Professor to girl walking into class with a large box: Wow, you have such a big package! (entire class starts laughing) I am so getting fired today.
Emerson College
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: miao miao
