Attractive passerby: And then she was all like, “my parents would never press charges against you.” And I was so touched…
Houston, Texas
Attractive passerby: And then she was all like, “my parents would never press charges against you.” And I was so touched…
Houston, Texas
Sweet old lady: Well, when we moved to Gilbert we started up a garden and thought we had volunteer tomato plants.
Sweet middle aged lady: Volunteer?
Sweet old lady: You know, they came up without us planting them. So I started watering them and giving them fertilizer, and they got pretty big. Then one day I was eating dinner and I saw a boy jump over our fence in the back, rip out one of the plants, and take off with it!
Sweet middle aged lady: He stole a tomato plant?
Sweet old lady: Well, there was a sheriff down the street a few days later, so I told him about it. He came over to look at them, and told me they were marijuana plants!
Sweet middle aged lady: They weren't tomatoes?
Sweet old lady: I thought they were, but whoever lived there before us must have planted marijuana in their yard, and when I started watering they sprung up again.
Sweet middle aged lady: That gives me a funny feeling, knowing your house had drug users in it.
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: Mia
Guy: Wouldn't it be funny if she was actually selling her baby down in Mexico, and she ended up on 48 Hours Mystery, and we could say we knew her when?
Girl: I don't think you understand comedy.
http://overheardlines.blogspot.com/2008/09/couple-discussing-friends-vacation.html
Overheard by: tim
Chick #1: I hope you never snap and become a serial killer.
Chick #2 (lovingly): Because I'd kill you first!
Chick #1: I know.
Chick #2: And then I'd stuff you… I would stuff you with your clothes so you smell like yourself.
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: Good Advice!
Hipster girl #1: Those are nice (points at earrings), where did you get them?
Hipster girl #2: Oh, I stole these. I only steal earrings, for some reason. So did your parents ever get those goats for their farm?
Hipster girl #1: Not yet, but my mom said they're going to start growing pot.
Hipster girl #2: That's cool.
Cafe
Durham, North Carolina
Overheard by: Vincent Ignatius
Girl: And it's not like Jeffery Dahmer crazy, it's like Mel Gibson crazy.
Coffee Shop
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Asteria
Guy #1: Dude… that joke went to far.
Guy #2: You know what was going too far, David*? Breaking into my house.
Bolingbrook High School
Bolingbrook, Illinois
Professor: People break laws all the time, like stop signs and oral sex.
http://www.overheardatumbc.com