Queer #1: You said: “Oooh, girl, you can’t build a pyramid on top of a pyramid.”
Queer #2: Did I say: “Oooh, girl”?! I did not say “Oooh, girl”!
Memphis, Tennessee
Overheard by: The Faghag
Queer #1: You said: “Oooh, girl, you can’t build a pyramid on top of a pyramid.”
Queer #2: Did I say: “Oooh, girl”?! I did not say “Oooh, girl”!
Memphis, Tennessee
Overheard by: The Faghag
Teen girl to classmates: Jesus was not a President!
US History Class, High School
San Diego, California
College girl: And then she got all high and mighty about it. She was like: “Remember when you passed out in my bathroom? I do!” And I was like: “Remember when you were born and looked like a man? I do!”
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Overheard by: Russ
Girl, observing a display of plush microbes: I want herpes! I think it’s so cute!
SUNY
Geneseo, New York
Overheard by: Jeni
Guy #1: What are you gonna do for your spare?
Guy #2: I don’t know, probably get a sandwich and beat off in the library.
High School
British Columbia
Canadia
Overheard by: Nick
Mother to quietly weeping child: Can’t you just… be happy?
Target Parking Lot
Cumming, Georgia
Overheard by: Caylin
Goth chick: Don’t talk to me about the year 2012. The year 2012 is seriously pissing me off.
Otaku chick: Try to stick around for 2013 anyway. Just trust me on this one.
University Plaza
Colorado State
Student: So if I, like, read something in the library and I memorize it, am I, like, stealing it with my mind?
Instructor: Yes. You can steal things with your mind.
Copy Editing Class
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia
Chick: Do I look pregnant in this dress?
Boyfriend: Nah, I told you. It just looks like something a pregnant person would wear.
Lakeline Mall
Austin, Texas
Little boy, to stoic mother in shoe aisle: I love the night life! I like the boobies! I love the night life! I like the boobies!
(five minutes later, at checkout lane)
Little boy, to stoic mother: I love the night life! I like the boobies! I love the night life! I like the boobies!…
Kohl’s
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Me too, my man.
