See, That's the Spirit!

Shocked woman: What do you mean you took out a loan? Do you have any idea how long it's going to take to pay off? You're unemployed, for god's sake!
Indifferent man: Pffft… I won't have to pay it back. Obama is going to lose the election and the Republicans will get in. Then they'll nuke the fuck out of everyone, for Jesus. May as well enjoy life now.

Leamington Spa
England

Overheard by: Bleep

Posted on June 18, 2015
Default

And It'll Come Easily for You

Linguistics professor: Just pay attention to how that thing feels in your mouth, and its position.

UCCS, Colorado Springs

Posted on June 18, 2015
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Summer's Eve Box: Have It Your Vajayway

Girl #1: So I saw you had some summer's eve in your bathroom earlier… Do you have a douche?
Girl #2: I saw that when I was in there too! It's not a douche. I looked at the box. It's just wipes.
Girl #1: Why would you need wipes?
Girl #3: You know when you eat a hamburger and have ketchup on your face, so you use a napkin to wipe it off? Well it's just like that, but it's for your vagina!

Appleton, Wisconsin

Posted on June 18, 2015
Compare and contrast, Default, Douching, Food, Girls, Questions, Vagina, Wisconsin

Good Luck Explaining That to Non-Native Speakers

American college guy to friends: My mom told me I was pussy-whipped.

Brussels National Airport
Belgium

Overheard by: aja

Posted on June 18, 2015
Airports & flights, Belgium, Default, Family ties, Guys, Stupidity, Yeahhh, college!

…And Boy Are My Arms Tired!

Hootchie #1: Yeah, we just got back from a dildo party.
Hootchie #2: And we smell like two-dollar hookers!

Des Moines, Iowa

Posted on June 18, 2015
Compare and contrast, Default, Hoochies, Iowa, Money, Sensory experiences, Toys

Do I Know You, Sir?

Guy to girl just waking up from her nap: Your nipples are rock hard!
Girl: Huh?
Guy: Are you cold or something?
Girl, befuddled: No…
Guy: You must have been having an awesome dream, then!

Bayonne, New Jersey

Posted on June 17, 2015
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Don’t Lick the Glass This Time, Okay?

Guy outside of dressing room: Dude, what are you doing?
Guy in dressing room: I’m having some me time.
Guy outside of dressing room: I’m bored. (thinks about it for several seconds) I’ll be looking at belts.
Guy in dressing room: I’ll be looking at me.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/310148350/can-you-just-see-his-point-n-wink.html

Overheard by: business casual

Posted on June 17, 2015
Creepsters, Default, Friends, Guys, Masturbation, Overheard in Minneapolis, Weirdness

Joking in Florida Is Always Risky

Lost mother with child to employee: Excuse me, sir? Where can I find the exit?
Employee (bluntly): Um, you have to buy something before you can leave.
Lost mother with child: (blank stare)

Sam Ash
Orlando, Florida

Overheard by: Stole something instead