Three-year-old boy, pulling action figure out of a box of toys, whispering: I love you, He-Man. (louder) I love you, He-Man! (at the top of his little lungs) I love you, He-Man!
Monarc Thrift Shop
Red Bank, New Jersey
Overheard by: klutch
Three-year-old boy, pulling action figure out of a box of toys, whispering: I love you, He-Man. (louder) I love you, He-Man! (at the top of his little lungs) I love you, He-Man!
Monarc Thrift Shop
Red Bank, New Jersey
Overheard by: klutch
Suit #1: I can’t believe I’ve lost them again!
Suit #2: Are we talking about dildos still or the midgets?
McDonald’s Parking Lot
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: I wish I heard the first part of this conversation
Girl on cell: Listen, he is not a nice guy. Anyone with handcuffs permanently attached to his bed frame is not a nice guy.
University of Mary Washington
Fredericksburg, Virginia
Overexposed springbreaker: Well, since it was a communal dildo, I thought I would be considerate and clean it off.
Tallahassee, Florida
Overheard by: Ew!
20-something in pink heels, on a Saturday afternoon: God, I’m like frickin walk of shame Barbie right now.
eavesdropdc.blogspot.com
Woman on cell: Wait, what? How does that work? Oh, okay — I was thinking of a different strap-on.
Chicago, Illinois
Sad girl: My mom totally jacked my vibrator.
Friend: That sucks! I can lend you mine, if you want.
Queen’s University
Canadia
Chick looking at Bratz dolls: What happened to Barbie? Who are these people? Why are they trying to sell my five-year-old sister a doll that looks like a prostitute?
Target
Mount Vernon, New York
Very well-behaved boy: Mom, I have been so good lately, can I please get a toy?
Very patient mom: Do you have any money?
Very well-behaved boy: Um… no, but you do. I looked in your wallet this morning.
Very patient mom: That's snooping!
Very well-behaved boy: Well, daddy does it all the time!
Salem, New Hampshire
Overheard by: Jenna
Loud girl: And my mother said to me, “Well, I guess you're an adult now, since you have adult sex.” And I was like, “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” and she was like, “I opened your cupboard.” and I was thinking, “Oh shit!” because I've got a lot of shit in there. I've got porn, I've got a vibrator, a cock ring. I've got things she doesn't even know what to call them!
University of Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Alex Remnick
