Kids

Biology teacher: Can anyone give me an example of a parasite?
Girl: A baby!

Madison, Wisconsin

Overheard by: Tangent

Ten-year-old girl walking on cut down tree: Oh, I bet this is what they make wood out of!

Cambridge
Ontario
Canadia

Teenager, noticing little girl being led around by her mother on a leash: Look! White people be putting their kids on leashes!

The Galleria
St. Louis, Missouri

Teacher: No one liked middle school. Everyone hates middle school. I'd rather starve to death than teach middle school. I'd rather starve my baby to death than teach middle school.
Student: I liked middle school.
Teacher: Freak!

Portland, Maine

Man: So how's your baby?
Young woman: Great. He's three months old now, so he's no longer just a glorified fetus! He has emotions, and everything!
(pause)
Man, awkwardly: Oh. Huh, how about that?

Mohonk Resort
New Paltz, New York

Overheard by: Ali

Teenager, chasing after young boy on bike: I'm gonna eat your children!

Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: Li'l Bit

Middle-aged man on bus: I made the mistake of letting my grandkids come over Saturday. They are nothing but little virus factories!

http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2007/08/offspring.html

Overheard by: micah

Daddy: If you don't eat…
Three-year-old boy: You'll hit my butt? I like it when you hit my butt, it feels good on my super wee-wee!

Chick-fil-A
Columbia, South Carolina

Overheard by: Carrie

(little girl is spinning and singing in grocery store line)
Dad, very calmly: Honey… Next time the gypsies come to town, they're leaving with an extra person.

Severna Park, Maryland

Older man: You kids gonna come out and play?
Kid: Play what?
Older man: Cornhole.

Indiana