Little girl, regarding orangutan holding his head like he has a headache: Why is he doing that, Mommy?
Mom: Because he had too many Daddy juices.
http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/06/havent_had_a_serious_wtf_for_a.html
Overheard by: I love hilarious reminders of our dysfunctional society
Mother, queuing at nativity play: Well, of course, she was disappointed to be a shepherd. I mean, children are smart these days. She knows full well there weren't any female shepherds back then.
Milton Keynes
England
Eight-year-old girl: Asians are ruining everything.
Mother: What?
Eight-year-old girl: Yeah, the Japanese, the Chinese — they ruin everything.
Georgia
Ten-year-old: Mom, what's “shagging”?
Mom: Um… It's like shedding. You know, like how the cat sheds hair on the couch?
Four-year-old: No, it's not. It's when two people have sex. Jeez!
Clarksville, Indiana
Mom to little boy picking up Raid: No poisonous chemicals for you, sweetie. Not today, at least…
Target
New Jersey
Little boy: Mommy! I want to get my daddy this card!
Mother: But honey, you don’t know what that means.
Little boy: Yes, I do! I do!
Mother: Okay, what does it mean?
Little boy: Pull my finger. It means… pull my finger! That’s what you do, right? You pull the monkey’s finger.
Mother: Um… Honey, you don’t know what that means. Here, why don’t you give Daddy this other card instead?
Little boy, crying: No! I do know what it means. I want to get my daddy this card! He would like it!
Mother, sighing: Okay, fine… But you don’t know what it means.
Little boy, happily: My daddy is really going to like this card! I just know it!
Fred Meyer
Springfield, Oregon
Mom of small child, on cell: No, I don’t have any whiskey, but I have tequila.
Small child, pulling away: No, Mommy! Don’t kill me!
Cogshall Park
Fitchburg, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Why, why, why?!
Mom to young son: There's a doggie! Do you know what sound a doggie makes?
Son: Mooo.
Mom, distracted by shiny things: Uh-huh. (pause) Hey! Dogs don't say “moo”!
Target
Leominster, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Manda
Four-year-old girl licking gelato off a tiny spoon: This tastes like electricity!
Mom: That's right, honey.
Piccomolo Gelato Shop
Fairfax, Virginia
Overheard by: Meaggoo
Angry kid: Mom! I don’t want to go shopping!
Mom: We are not shopping — we are on an adventure!
Oshkosh, Wisconsin
Overheard by: I love adventures
