One of Life’s Opportunists

Dude #1: Did you see the gash on his forehead?
Chick: Oh my god, there’s another fight going on!
Dude #2: Oh, look! The lunch line is short!

Glen A. Wilson High School
Hacienda Heights, California

Posted on November 16, 2013
California, Food, North America, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Students, USA, Violence

God, You’re Such a Maudlin Drunk

Dad to howling toddler: Stop it! Suck it up! You don’t hear anyone else crying, do you?

United flight descending into O’Hare
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Rose Fox

Posted on November 15, 2013
Airports & flights, Dads, Illinois, Maladies, North America, Parenting, Parents, USA

I Seem to Be Retaining Coors

Guy: Dude, that is your belly.

http://nimbleit.21publish.com/OverheardUtah/archive/2006/08/04/g8433gkfpbil.htm/

Posted on November 15, 2013
Body parts, Frat boy types, Jocks, North America, Overheard in Utah, Stomach, USA, Utah

Whatever. You Had That Cushy Yellow Raft

Mexican boy: We have to get up at 4 in the morning to go to school every day.
Mexican grandma: Yeah, well, I had to swim the Rio Grande to get to this country. So what?

Third Street Promenade
Santa Monica, California

Overheard by: Amused third generation Mexican

Posted on November 15, 2013
California, Mexicans, North America, Old folks, USA

Wish I Could Say the Same for You

Boyfriend: Hey, did you guys go see the camel?
Girlfriend: No, where is it?
Pal: Don’t even bother. It’s so ugly. It looks so out of place… It’s probably thinking, ‘What the hell am I doing in Ithaca?! I could probably be scoring hot camel chicks in Egypt or something.’
Boyfriend: That’s what I think every day.
Girlfriend: What?
Boyfriend: Don’t worry, babe, I’m sure he’ll get laid by another loner camel in Ithaca.

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/05/huge-update.html/

Overheard by: willard straight, also dj-mee

Posted on November 15, 2013
Animals, Couples, New York, North America, Overheard at Cornell, Sex, Students, USA

Hobo Scientist Cracks the Container Principle

Hobo, gesturing to trash can: I was right! There’s definitely a big hole in this thing!

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2006/09/computer-back-sun-resolved-everyone.html/

Overheard by: dek

Posted on November 15, 2013
Hobos, Homeless, New York, North America, Overheard at Cornell, USA

Will the Lights Be Off, and the Chairs Well Separated?

Teacher before movie: There is one part with a naked woman in it. Are you guys ok with that?
Guy: Is it an ugly woman?
Teacher: No.
Guy: Then we should be fine.

Cupertino High School
Cupertino, California