Pee

Tough guy at urinal: So you live around here?
Tough guy at different urinal: Nope, just pee here.

Grand Rapids, Michigan

Overheard by: Cameron

Receptionist to executive assistant: …so in conclusion, I got peed on…by a taxi driver…who I dated.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/316536671/and-it-didnt-work-out.html

Overheard by: Ian

Little girl pointing to handicapped sink: Mommy, do you know what that’s for?
Mom: It’s a sink for people in wheelchairs, honey.
Little girl: No! It’s where boys pee!

Bathroom, JCPenney’s
Forest Park, Georgia

Overheard by: Kelly

Volunteer director to group of teenage volunteers: Now, ya gotta be careful or the tractor tires will catch on fire.
Teenage volunteers: (incredulous laughter)
Volunteer director: No, seriously! Last year they caught on fire and I totally had to pee on them!

Sonoma County, California

Overheard by: where was I last year?!

Mother in bathroom stall with four-year-old son: No, no, you're peeing on mommy. Aim lower! Aim lower!

Chili's
Augusta, Georgia

Five-year boy in front of a door: (frantically) Which one? I have to go!
Exasperated mother: The men’s room.
Little boy: Which one?!
Mother: That one (points) and that’s why you need to learn to read.

Barnes & Noble
Cary, North Carolina

Enraged Frenchman to woman and son who is discreetly peeing on wall: What is wrong with you? Find a bathroom, this is a business! (starts walking away and then comes to a woman and her teenage daughter sitting on steps) And you two, get out! What are you, from the mountains? (to himself, walking away) Oh my god! I don't believe this!

Fira
Santorini
Greece

Little girl in next stall: But what if Old Faithful starts going while we're not out there?
Girl's mother: Well, you'll have to pee really quickly so mommy can pee and then we can go.
Little girl: But you take a long time to pee.
Mother: Yes, I know.
(pause)
Little girl: You take a long time to pee.
Mother: Well, thank you for announcing that to the entire bathroom.

Restroom, Old Faithful Inn
Yellowstone National Park, Wyoming

Little girl running back from bathroom with her father: Mommy, I got pee on my finger!

Perkins restaurant
Erie, Pennsylvania

Man at urinal, peeing, to no one in particular: This toilet smells like my sadness.

Bar
London
England

Overheard by: Dirty PJ