Shopping

Guy #1: What aisle are we looking for?
Guy #2: We should be looking under teen girls' rugs.
Guy #1: Yikes!

Furniture Store
New York City, New York

Customer: Do you sell Elastoplast?
Shop lady: What?
Customer: Do you sell Elastoplast?
Shop lady oh, I thought you said something about “the last of the Apaches.”
Customer: That film was called The Last of the Mohicans.
Shop lady: What film?

Glasgow
Scotland

Overheard by: somedaftlassie

Little boy, desperately: I need to get out of here!

Kohl's Fitting Rooms
Georgia

Overheard by: Iris

(a couple at the checkout counter buying nylons)
Girl: I’m really excited for these tights.
Guy (excessively excited): Me too!

Halifax
Nova Scotia
Canadia

[A young woman in a wetsuit and a young man in normal clothing are standing near the packaged meats.]Female employee: Can I help you with anything?
Young woman: Oh, no thanks, we’re just admiring the bacon.
Female employee: Oh. Okay! Have a nice day!

Vons
Ventura, California

Roommate #1: Do you want to go clothes shopping for spring break?
Roommate #2, making disgusted face: I don't wear clothes on spring break.
Roommate #1: (long pause)
Roommate #2: I just wear a bathing suit.

University of Michigan, Ann Arbor

Overheard by: Roommate #3

Shorter kid playing basketball to taller kid: Your dad bought your mom at Ikea!

Watertown, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Ariel

Son: Mom, can we get something?
Mom: No.
Son: Can we get some Life Savers?
Mom: No.
(son walks over with five Hershey bars)
Son: These?
Mother: No. And if I bought them, I'd eat them all in front of you.

Rocky River, Ohio

Overheard by: Beanah

Woman: Jorge, I wanna go to Kmart!
Man: Yeah, and I want chop suey. We all have our dreams, Maria.

Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: Kate

Hot chick: I’m having a fantasia party; I made it a facebook event: Are you going to come?
Clueless girl: Whats a fantasia party?
Hot chick: Its for like chicks only, you hang out, drink and buy naughty stuff.
Clueless girl: I don’t get it?
Hot chick: What’s there to get? You come to my place, get drunk and buy sexy, naughty things?
Clueless girl: I still don’t get it.
Hot chick: Holy fuck! Its like a Tupperware party -only with dildos!

Ottawa
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Make Mine 9 Inches!