Should have used a condom

Small child to father: You're a sad puppy that burps. You're a stinky puppy that's sad… and burps.

Overheard by: elizabeth

Eight-year-old boy: Don’t you know that the Kool-Aid Man doesn’t exist?! He’s just a tool for marketing!

Norristown, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Lan

Five-year-old girl to sister: Who would you rather kill — Mummy or Daddy?
Mother: I don’t want to hear you talking like that.

New Zealand

Overheard by: disturbed

Woman to five-year-old daughter in elevator: You're getting off at the wrong floor, sweetie. This is the wrong floor… The wrong floor… The wrong floor! God, do you ever listen to me?
Five-year-old daughter: I'm trying not to.

Mackinac Island, Michigan

Overheard by: laughing

Mother handing son bag of groceries: Here you go.
Son: Me?
Mother: Yes, you, silly.
Son, pouting: But I’m special.
Mother: No, you’re not.

Melbourne Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Ali

Heavy guy looking at atlas: What’s a ‘labia’?
Son: One of those Eastern European countries.

Barnes & Noble
Peoria, Illinois

3-year-old in parking lot: Mommy, I want MONEY!
Mother: Yes, honey. Me too.

Gilroy, California

Overheard by: just a cart pusher

Three-year-old to mom on bus: Mom, can you show me how to play my dvd?
Mom: Sure. Why are you asking me now?
Three-year-old: In case.
Mom: In case? In case of what?
Three-year-old, matter of factly: In case you die.


Teen son to mother: Whats wrong?
Sulking mother: Well, it's just that it's my birthday and you're all just buying things for yourselves.

Department Store
West Australia

Overheard by: linda

Three-year-old: I have two daddies! I have two daddies!
Irritated mother, dragging child out of store: Come on.

Merced, California

Overheard by: oh. my. god.