Stupidity

Confused chick: Excuse me, sir, I don’t know which line to go into… This says ‘resident,’ but I’m not from here — I’m from New York.
Homeland Security agent: It’s still this line.

O’Hare Airport immigration line
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: amused traveller

Pizza delivery guy, singing, with a handful of Froot Loops: Frooooooot loooooops!
Later, coming out of building: Everybody loves Froooooot Looooooooooops!

UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts

Overheard by: chromathegreat

Nerdy teen #1: So you just sort of put your hands down her pants and rub up behind her.
Nerdy teen #2 (nodding): Yeah. I know what you mean.

Vancouver
Canadia

Overheard by: iloveholidays

Girlfriend: You’re still tying your shoes with bunny ears?
Boyfriend: The other way is really hard!
Girlfriend: It’s so easy!
Boyfriend: Look, I have to do the bunny ears. I can’t tie my shoes the other way. It’s like, the bunny goes around the tree 50 billion times, then hides in its hole, comes out and the mongoose chases it… Then the rabbit eats the apple!

High school
Hamburg, New York

Professor: They were playing the Rocky theme song while I was trying to think great thoughts.

McDaniel College, Maryland

Linguistics professor, after girl asks question: Well, the short answer would be ‘Yes,’ and by ‘yes’ I mean ‘no.’

http://www.overheardatmcgill.com/

Overheard by:

Girl #1: Yeah, and so I threw the Internet cord from the top of the fire escape down to the bottom instead of walking all the way down. It was pretty exciting.
Girl #2: Ummm, okay then…
Girl #1: Well, it was okay! It’s like throwing a baby down the stairs — you know you shouldn’t, but you do it anyway!
Girl #2: Okay…

Illinois

Freshman girl: Well, like, this was from like 2 am the day it was due. I mean, the first one I submitted was of me with a pacifier in my mouth, and they told me it was inappropriate at the last minute. I mean, like, why couldn't they have told me that in January when I submitted it?

University
Connecticut

Overheard by: You really needed to be told?

College girl: You would be amazed by what I can do with the English language.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/413255774/there-are-no-surprises-left.html

Overheard by: and what else can you do?

Professor: So Russia had this really phallus-oriented system of government…

University
Newfoundland
Canadia

Overheard by: Mel